


Ember

by Warriorgazer909



Category: Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Always Female Tony Stark, Arc Reactor, Crazy!Toni, Dragon!Toni, Gen, Not Canon Compliant, Secret Identity, Slow Build, Slow To Update, Tags Are Hard, Tags May Change, Tony Angst, Tony Feels, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark-centric
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-12
Updated: 2019-06-07
Packaged: 2020-01-12 03:00:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 20,025
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18437654
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Warriorgazer909/pseuds/Warriorgazer909
Summary: It starts, Toni supposes, when the humvee explodes.//Or the one where Toni's a dragon, and she still survives the MCU





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [RayShippouUchiha](https://archiveofourown.org/users/RayShippouUchiha/gifts).
  * Inspired by [The Limitations of Wax](https://archiveofourown.org/works/6606808) by [RayShippouUchiha](https://archiveofourown.org/users/RayShippouUchiha/pseuds/RayShippouUchiha). 
  * Inspired by [Stark Raving Mad](https://archiveofourown.org/works/998273) by [miniongrin](https://archiveofourown.org/users/miniongrin/pseuds/miniongrin). 
  * Inspired by [Smoke and Mirrors](https://archiveofourown.org/works/6840247) by [Riverlander974](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Riverlander974/pseuds/Riverlander974). 



> It's been two fuckin years for this damn thing, y'all. Two. Years. Honestly I'm sick of myself at this point
> 
> Besides that, I don't really have a lot to say, other than the dialogue has been a complete bitch and Toni's voice for me might be a little OOC, but all things considered I think I can be forgiven
> 
> Also, tags are hard, and they will probably update with every chapter because hell if I know what to tag at this point
> 
> I have to give very, very special thanks to Ray, because Ember was heavily inspired by LoW and I cannot give her enough credit for that masterpiece
> 
> I wrote this nice and long to try and appease you all because this is (mostly) all I've written and considering it took me two years to finally work out a satisfying chapter I honestly cannot begin to tell you when chapter two will be out
> 
> That being said, enjoy! Hopefully for everyone's sake I get the next one written quickly

It starts, Toni supposes, when the humvee explodes.

Startled, sleep deprived, and certainly on edge, she watches the young soldiers go clambering out the doors, watches them straighten up from their relaxed moods and start thinking about _war_.

She's seen it in a thousand eyes, in the set of a thousand shoulders. They're no different from the rest, even as one turns to her, commanding her to stay in the vehicle. They're a team, maybe not as efficient, and certainly not blood-brothers, but they fight together.

Toni has little intention of staying in the humvee, even if it had been Rhodey telling her to stay. Shrapnel shears through the humvee's side as she ducks out of the door, dust and blood and fire billowing, gunshots sounding all around her.

She has half a mind to be concerned for Rhodey, and most of her is focused on getting to him. There's no clear shot of the other humvees, though, so Toni tucks herself down on the side of the road to wait.

Well, she would have, except not two seconds after she's slid her phone out to text Pepper, she hears the bomb hit the sand next to her. The name takes another second to register, and by then, even if Toni had those few seconds, it's too late.

Fire explodes across her face, throwing her back against the dirt, and only after she's managed to get some of her breath back does she register the shrapnel slowly embedding itself into her chest.

Even as she pries her dress shirt open, she knows it's gone through the bulletproof vest. Even her vest wasn't made to defend against that type of explosion, that close.

_Have to remember that_ , Toni thinks, as the combination of the attack and the past few days finally catches up to her.

//

Afghanistan _breaks_ her.

//

She remembers the surgery. Remembers fire lacing its way through her chest, her _bones_. Remembers taking too-blunt nails, and weakly scratching at whatever she could reach. Remembers wishing for her fire, for her teeth, so she could defend herself.

Toni spends days after the 'surgery' shivering in pain, slowly losing herself to the sensation, until Yinsen shocks her back out of it each night by making her eat. The demands make her laugh. They're not imaginative in the slightest, wanting her to build bombs she's already designed. It's not new, not to her. She cackles at them and hisses, in their own language, that she _refuses_.

The first punishment is a beating, one that gets told off when they get reminded she needs her hands.

The second is the water boarding.

The _terror_ of not being able to breathe, of not being able to free herself, sends her under half the time. The other half is the bolts of electricity that shock her when the car battery gets wet.

//

After one such punishment, Toni wakes to Howard in her face. She hisses at him, drawing Yinsen's attention, and only stares when he confirms he can't see Howard.

He's the first, but he certainly isn't the last.

When Toni finally gives in, she's not sure what or who is real, at this point, and only trusts Yinsen. He's gentled towards her, especially after Howard first appeared. He reminds her to eat, to sleep, to _breathe_ sometimes. So, she watches him, and slowly her world shapes around him, and _pain_. She's just not sure what else is real, even as she lets him help slide the arc reactor into her chest.

He reminds her to eat, when she stares into the fire just a little too long, gently moves her hands away from the flames when she reaches out. She does it a lot, he says, after she asks. Toni doesn't remember doing it before. He reminds her to sleep when she lays down to rest, and ends up staring at the ceiling too long, forgetting why she laid down in the first place.

It feels like only minutes pass when they come to get her, again and again and again, until she _remembers_ and she tells them _yes_.

They give her metal and tools and demand that she build them a bomb. Another _Jericho_ , something devastating and _deadly_.

(Sometimes Toni thinks she's underwater. Sometimes she is. She holds her breath, tries to breathe, chokes. Now whenever her mind wanders there she looks for Yinsen. If she can see Yinsen, she can breathe. There's no water in her lungs then, because if she couldn't she would only see the dark corners of the bucket.)

//

When they pull her head out from the tank, as she's desperately gasping for air she forgets, for just a moment. Forgets that she has a secret, forgets that she needs to keep it. She feels scales ripple, briefly, along her spine, distracting her from the men demanding she build them weapons. Toni stares blankly at the man yelling at her, still gasping, while she fights the change and she _doesn't know why_.

(It only gets worse.)

She laughs, now, when they come to torture her. It gives them pause, and in between she snarls, teeth sharpened and she doesn't know _why_.

//

Yinsen helps her build the reactor, and she coughs when it slides smoothly into her chest, heavy on her bones. She only lets Yinsen touch her chest, but she's not sure if anyone else has really _tried_. The Ten Rings soldiers sometimes get looped into her visions, Yinsen tells her.

The reactor is... _odd_. It's heavy, a new weight that pulls on her collarbones and ribs in a way she takes weeks to get used to, but the odd hum she can feel is somewhat soothing. The blue is soft, and she learns to start trusting it the way she trusts Yinsen. It doesn't shine on the people Yinsen can't see.

It's also thrumming with _energy_ , making her feel awake in way that coffee doesn't anymore. For the first week she barely sleeps, driven on by the machine in her chest, until Yinsen gently tells her to lay down and close her eyes.

//

The suit certainly is something.

She almost hates it.

It's big and consuming, and she's been gearing towards _smooth_ and _streamlined_ for years now. Still, it'll protect them long enough to get out, even if she doesn't always remember _why_. At least, not until she looks at Yinsen, and she remembers his Gulmira, his _family_. Yinsen reminds her about Pepper and Rhodey, now, whenever she stops working for a little too long.

Yinsen keeps her focused, reminds her to eat and sleep, and hands her tools when she asks. While she builds her mind feels _clear_ again, except she looks up to see _Jarvis_ , holding out a small toolkit and a book, soft words on his lips as he helps her clear her mind, no matter that she's almost thirty years older.

The suit slowly comes together. When Yinsen insists that she rest if she cannot sleep, he tells her stories of his home country, of his family. Toni thinks of Rhodey and Pepper and Happy, of _JARVIS_ and her bots, and tells him the same.

If some of the stories seem dated, intertwined with old words and dead languages, then Yinsen is kind enough not to question her, only that she explain it.

//

Toni's mind is very, abruptly clear the day she starts thinking in animal terms.

Yinsen smiles with his lips closed, hiding his teeth. Raza, behind his mask, bares his teeth in an almost feral grin, and ever so slightly, her language shifts. She starts paying less attention to words, and a little more to actions. Yinsen taps whatever he wants her to pay attention to. Raza always leans forward, to make her shrink back.

All of Raza's men hide behind their guns.

It's Yinsen that tells her to _listen_ and not to look, to follow his words and not his hands. He succeeds most of the time. She still notices when he's simply talking for noise, or to tell her something by watching his hands.

He smiles with his lips, she notices. They're rare, usually only behind some little quip she's managed to spit out, but she notices. Raza smiles with his teeth, pulling his lips back and grinning madly into her face, and Toni just grins back, and notes that her teeth are _definitely_ sharper.

(Toni also remembers when she starts thinking hers and not hers. It's a mindset she's never quite shaken off, but it's never been so... simple-minded before. It's a one-track train of thought she'd had to partially discard, but the distinction helps keep her from hissing at Yinsen, when he startles her, sometimes.)

//

Yinsen practically shoves her into the suit, and when he _leaves her_ to grab a gun and clear the path, she wrenches free from the rack as soon as she can, comes stalking down the tunnel, teeth bared behind the mask and scales rippling along her arms and spine.

Except— except Yinsen is lying against the wall, blood coating his chest and mouth, and more comes up when he coughs, but he leaves her in the middle of the caves, slumped against the wall, finally in Gulmira.

_Don't waste your life._

Toni—

Toni doesn't remember anything.

//

She thinks she's flying, there's wind on her face and she can taste fire on her tongue, except—

Except her wings aren't catching the high drafts, except the fire is tinged with chemicals.

Except she's surrounded by metal.

//

Toni drags herself from the wreckage, coughing and panting. She's not sure how long she sits and looks at the metal, but it's only after she starts coughing again that she finally takes the shirt off and wraps it around her face.

It's a relief to be able to tuck her hair back again, but she's not sure why it bothered her so much in the first place. Maybe Yinsen could've told her.

She wanders the desert, following an invisible path she doesn't know, tripping over desert plants and small holes in the dirt until she finally starts watching her feet. At first, sounds draw her attention, until they recognize themselves as air, as small, inconsequential animals, as her feet.

So it takes her a moment to realize there's a _new_ noise, buffering high over her head. She recognizes the shape, when she looks up, but she doesn't know what it's called, for a moment.

It lands, and Toni's still not sure it's real, until suddenly Rhodey's _there_ , and Toni can breathe again.

She's not sure what sounds she's making, if she's even breathing, but Rhodey's _there_ and it's _okay_. His arms are practically crushing her against his chest, and her face is tucked so deeply into his shoulder she can't breathe right, but she doesn't want to move. Whimpers when Rhodey gently tugs her from the dirt onto the helicopter, hides in his shoulder when he sits them on the bench.

He waves the doctor away when she tenses, and turns to whisper into her ear. Toni can't hear the words, not really, but his tone is soothing and quiet and Toni can _breathe_.

(Except— except Yinsen was _hers_ and now he's _gone_ but Toni has another one of _hers_ holding her, and she can breathe but she can't because _hers_ is _gone_ and she still can't tell the different between water and air.)

//

The landing jars her chest enough that she hisses, startling Rhodey. He let her get away without being seen in the air, but they're at base now, she knows. There's a disorienting moment when she tries to think about why, but after a moment Rhodey starts tugging her from the little safe spot she made in the back of her shoulder, and she has other things to worry about.

The lights are too bright, when Rhodey sits her down in the hospital bed, and Toni _snarls_ when one of the doctors reach for her.

There's a pause, and then Rhodey's taking her hands in his, drawing her gaze to his face. "Toni, baby girl, it's okay." He tells her, because he needs her to pay attention. "I'm right here, it's okay." He tucks her into his side and keeps whispering in her ear, and Toni lets him deal with the doctors, up until they try to inspect her chest, and even Rhodey can't keep her calm.

She jerks back from their gentled hands, from the safety of being tucked into Rhodey's side, practically falls from the bed in her rush to get away.

Her lip is bleeding but she doesn't know why. She needs them _away_ , but she _doesn't know why_ , and it takes all she has to keep the change at bay, but it's easier when Rhodey comes into view. He's being _gentle_ , in a way he hasn't been since she was fourteen again.

Rhodey's _safe_ , though, and she lets him tug her out of the corner, but she hisses when the doctors try to come forward again. Rhodey says something and they leave the room, the door closing behind them, but Toni doesn't feel trapped.

Rhodey takes her hand again. He wants her attention. She gives it to him.

He asks her, asks if he can see, because he needs to know if she's healthy.

Toni pauses. Only Yinsen was allowed to touch her chest— but Yinsen's dead. Rhodey's safe, yes? Rhodey was _hers_. Rhodey could see.

She nods, ignoring the sad confusion on his face, and takes a hand from Rhodey's to tug her shirt up, until the reactor is visible.

Rhodey _freezes_. There's horror on his face when Toni looks, and it jolts Toni because Rhodey doesn't _freeze_. Rhodey doesn't look horrified. Toni spent several years in MIT living by Rhodey's emotions; when Rhodey was happy and amused and unconcerned, everything was fine. But this time Toni didn't forget to eat, or quit sleeping because her brain was too loud, so she doesn't know how to fix it this time.

Rhodey's fingers startle her, warm on the numbed edge of the reactor, but Toni's still watching Rhodey's face.

His eyes are trained on the reactor, but they flicker up to hers after a moment, when Toni doesn't react to him touching the reactor.

" _Tones_ ," his voice is shaky, when he speaks. "what _happened_?"

For a while, Toni had quit speaking, except for when Yinsen had asked her questions about the old stories she told. For the first time, she feels the urge to speak again, because Afghanistan held visions that hadn't been worth acknowledging, but Rhodey, _Rhodey_ , she can talk to. It's _Rhodey_.

She works her throat, for a moment, and she barely recognizes her own voice when she finally manages to spit the word out.

" _Shrapnel_." Her voice is waspy, thin and almost silent. The word scrapes against her throat, makes her cough.

Rhodey's brows are furrowed, but he drops her hand long enough to turn and grab a cup, turns to the sink to fill it with—

" _No!_ " Toni's voice cracks over the word, and her throat burns like it's on fire, but her tone is sharp.

At least, she hopes it is.

Because she trusts Rhodey but water—

The thought almost makes her choke.

For a moment she can't _breathe_ again, and she looks around for Yinsen before she _remembers_ , remembers eyes dulling in the stillness of death, and Toni can't _breathe_ because she doesn't know if she's breathing in water or air and—

 

" _Toni!"_

 

Rhodey's voice jolts her out of her rising panic. His hands are tight on her shoulders, but he's holding her steady to his chest, and Toni can't help but remember being younger, in the same position.

"You with me, baby girl? I got you, Tones. I got you, okay?" Rhodey's speaking into the top of her ear, and she hears it through his chest as much as his mouth. She takes a couple of ragged, long breaths, and leans back against Rhodey's hold until she can look him in the eye.

 

"No water." She rasps.

 

"Tones—?"

 

_"No water."_

 

He looks at her, a long searching one that demands an explanation later, but he nods and lets her sink back against his shoulder until her racy heartbeat calms back down.

(Rhodey smiles with his teeth, too, but it's pulled aside, thinner than Raza's mad grin. It's Rhodey, so it's okay, though.)

//

Eventually, a nurse brings Toni a cup full of ice chips, and she and Rhodey find out she can drink water, so long as she can't see it, so Toni steps back on the plane with a lidded cup and a splint.

They agree to let Toni see a doctor about her chest state-side, so after a few hours and a nap on Rhodey, Toni's going home.

She falls asleep on him again, flipping the arm rest up and tucking herself back into his collarbones, fellow soldiers be damned. Rhodey'll make sure they're not being watched anyway.

//

Pepper smiles with her lips, Toni realizes. Oh, she's seen her smile before, blood-red lips around blunted fangs, but Pepper smiles at her with a closed mouth and it's not hard for Toni to smile back at her.

Pepper says something, tears in her eyes, but she's not demanding for Toni to listen so she doesn't.

Instead, Toni very abruptly wants a cheeseburger, so when they get in the car, Toni says as much. Pepper's immediate exasperation makes Toni relax, and Happy smiles with his lips, too.

The cheeseburger tastes _amazing._

(Pepper's _hers_. Pepper is wonderful, and amazing, and Toni sees the dragon-fire in her eyes, but Pepper is _hers_ all the same. Happy is _hers_ too, right up there with Pepper and Rhodey, coveted as her prized people. She never wants to let them go again— and this is where Toni had to abandon this, when protective became _possessive_ , when Toni couldn't discern between too _much_ and too little.)

//

The press crowd makes her hiss, and she wants nothing more than to stay in the car, almost starts to bare her teeth, until Pepper squeezes her hand. She still snarls at Stane when he offers her a hand out of the car, because he's not _safe_ like Pepper and Happy and Rhodey.

She endures the hug stiffly, and Pepper's expression makes her wonder if she didn't keep a tighter hold on the growl that had been building in the back of her throat, but she doesn't have time to ask.

The crowd of cameras and people draw Pepper's attention, and she, thankfully, ushers Toni away from Stane and towards the podium.

Toni's exhausted, so she asks everyone to sit down. Nicely, even, she thinks.

She's sure she's meant to talk about her capture, sure she needs to say something long and profound to keep the news outlets busy, but it's all Toni can do to keep it together.

So, she skips the formalities and goes straight for the jugular.

"I'm shutting the weapons program down."

//

The resulting noise is almost, _almost_ enough to startle Toni into snarling, but Stane's immediate hand on her shoulder keeps her in check long enough until she's back in the relative safety of Rhodey's circle. He's trying to do damage control behind her, but Stane smiles with his _teeth_ and Toni couldn't see his eyes, and for just a moment, the sunlight behind him, she saw _Raza_.

So Toni leaves him to the toothless wolves and lets Rhodey take her home.

(Rhodey is hers, hers, _hers_. Stane is a _not hers_ and has always been _Howard's_. Toni wants him to _rot_ , but she's never mentioned it, because she's not sure which is _too much_ and which is _too little_.)

//

Toni spends the first fifteen minutes wandering around. Rhodey lets her, sits on the couch and lets her brush her free hand along the walls, duck in and out of rooms until she's satisfied. Only after she's stood still for a solid minute does Rhodey quietly call her, and she willingly tucks herself back into his side on the couch.

 

"What was _that_ , Tones?" His voice is quiet, undemanding, so Toni answers.

 

It still takes her a moment to find the words, but she answers.

 

"They died." Her voice is stronger, now, but Toni's in loathe to break the relative quiet of the room. "I watched them die, and they were killed with _my weapons_ , Rhodey." Toni vaguely remembered the horror she'd experienced, at realizing the Ten Rings had _her_ weapons, had used them to attack the convoy keeping her safe. Between the water boarding and her declining sanity, Toni hadn't thought about it again, but it was the only thing she'd discerned that was important enough to tell the press.

 

"They wanted me to build them a Jericho. They had more than just guns, Rhodey. I— I can't let that _keep happening_."

 

Rhodey was silent, for a moment. His hand had started slowly drifting up and down her back, letting her tuck herself further into her side, even if the reactor had to be digging into his ribs right about then.

Even as Rhodey sits, thinking, Toni can't help but let her train of thought wander off into how _safe_ she feels. Three months, she knows now, she spent, relying only on Yinsen. At some point she wasn't even sure if the pain was real anymore, couldn't discern between her lungs burning for air or the reactor dragging on her bones, didn't know if her skin was burning or bleeding or fine.

(Toni still doesn't know, not twenty-four hours after being shipped home. Sometimes it still feels like water instead of air, but she hasn't had to search for Rhodey or Pepper in the darkness like she did Yinsen. Both had been in her sightline all day, and if Rhodey or Pepper didn't look worried, then Toni could breathe. They wouldn't let her drown. Pepper had looked especially unhappy when Rhodey had explained the water, but she also hadn't said anything and merely refilled Toni's water when she had asked.)

//

"Okay, Tones." Rhodey's voice startled her out of her reverie. "I don't know about the military, alright, but I'm with you."

 

Tension Toni hadn't known she was keeping seeped out at Rhodey's words.

 

Rhodey just tugged her closer, arm tight and reassuring across her back.

 

"I got you, Tones. Been in it for the long run since you were fourteen, yeah?"

 

"Yeah."

//

Rhodey, unfortunately, had to go back to base, if only to deal with the rest of the fallout they'd left to Pepper and Stane. Rhodey's as reluctant to leave as she is, but this is something Toni's _familiar_ with, at least. Doesn't make it any easier, and something in Toni _aches_ when she thinks about it, but Toni's been wishing Rhodey off since she was eighteen.

"You stay in here, Toni. I swear to god, baby girl, you better be here when I get back or so help me, I'm never letting you go _anywhere_."

Toni laughs, genuinely, for the first time since she left. She's not sure if her teeth are sharp when she does, but she makes sure to keep them hidden when the glee fades enough for her to answer.

"I will, Rhodey. I promise."

Rhodey gives her a long look, before pulling her into a last, long hug. His arms are trembling around her, and Toni lets him clutch as long as he needs. Afghanistan didn't only hurt her.

"I gotta go, Tones. I love you." His voice is shaking, just a little. "Stay safe, you hear me? _I got you_."

"I know, platypus." Toni whispers into his shoulder. "I love you too."

//

Toni watches Rhodey until he's driven off, and only then does she turn to the rest of the mansion.

"JARVIS?"

_"Yes, Miss?"_

Toni feels tears gathering as soon as she hears JARVIS' voice again. JARVIS— JARVIS wasn't her firstborn, no, that's DUM-E, but JARVIS was a desperate attempt made in the long hours during Rhodey's first tour. When Toni couldn't handle the nightmares or the pain any more, she turned to JARVIS.

"It's good to be back, baby boy."

_"Indeed, Miss. The bots have been waiting rather... impatiently for your return."_

Toni laughs again. The sound is a little watery, but JARVIS won't judge, and Toni doesn't care. She's just happy to be _home_.

"I shouldn't keep them waiting, then." Toni says, still smiling, as she turns towards the workshop.

_"Indeed, Miss."_

//

Walking back into her workshop feels like nirvana. She's _missed_ this, her safe spot, when Rhodey couldn't be there.

DUM-E and U come flying at her from the far corner of the 'shop, beeping and whirring like their lives depended on it. It's a miracle they don't crash directly into her, instead stopping to spin wild, happy circles around her under U finally slows down and gently grips her wrist in his claw. DUM-E takes another moment, but after almost plowing into U for the second time he tucks himself next to his brother and chirps a complaint into her shoulder.

Toni— Toni _croons_ , for the first time in _decades._ The sound is odd, thin and weak in her vocal chords, but her boys know what she's trying to do. U had never quite gotten the same cadence as DUM-E, but they try and match her, tone for tone, almost purring.

There's another hum, from the charging corner, where Butterfingers is sulking, almost ducked low enough to hide behind her workshop tables. A second later, JARVIS joins in, all-encompassing, but it does something to soothe Toni's soul like nothing else. These are her boys, and she's _home_.

She doesn't realize she's started crying until Butterfingers, finally emerged from his hiding place, bumps her chin with one of his claws, the other taking hold of her wrist. Toni laughs wetly and twists her arm enough to take a hold of his claw into her hand, doing the same to U and DUM-E's claws on her other arm. She lets the croon die down, but she still doesn't speak for a moment.

DUM-E chirps at her, and Toni laughs at him. She's missed her babies, for all that they're metal and wires instead of flesh and bone.

"I've _missed_ you," Toni purrs to them, stroking her thumb over their claws, until U pulls back and drifts off to the other side of the 'shop, done with the reunion, as it were. Butterfingers pulls off a moment later, but DUM-E stays close and tucked to her side. Toni pets his back strut before heading towards her workbench, the urge to _build_ ever strong, even in the face of the past three months.

(JARVIS and the bots are _hers, hers, **hers**._ DUM-E was her firstborn, a half-dreamed project when she was barely fifteen years old and surviving on coffee and whatever Rhodey managed to get her to eat. U and Butterfingers came after MIT, after Rhodey had been shipped out, after Toni was _alone_ for the first time. JARVIS, her lovely, lovely _dragon_ , came after _Jarvis_. They were hers, _hers, **hers**_  and Toni wouldn't give them up for the _world._ )

//

The first time Toni falls asleep, she wakes up clawing at her chest, struggling to breathe. She's not sure she's not breathing in water— until her eyes land on DUM-E. Her oldest bot is directly in front of her face, claw opening and closing slowly. DUM-E, she knows, wouldn't let her drown. None of her boys would.

The break on the vice holding her throat _burns_ , reminding her of an age she hadn't thought about in _centuries_.

It's only after the rush of oxygen starts to calm the burning in her chest does she hear JARVIS' voice.

" _—experienced a two percent change. The Dow Jones has fallen 32 points from the average—"_

"JARVIS?"

_"It is 2:31 am in the morning of the 16th. You are inside the Malibu mansion, Miss. You are **safe**."_

Toni takes a trembling hand and rests it on DUM-E's claw, rubbing her thumb over one joint when he turns it enough to take her hand in a gentle grip. DUM-E's version of crooning is drawn-out whistles and beeps, metallic and tinny, but Toni always recognizes the noise, now. U and Butterfingers sound a little different, since Toni had planned for their singing, far more than she had for DUM-E. They're more humming than whistles, lacking that tinny edge that DUM-E's has, but Toni loves them all the same.

JARVIS, though, _JARVIS_ is the one that sounds the closest to actual crooning. Her clever boy had taken a sound file from when she'd been changed, when she visited Italy last time, had sung for them well into the night. He'd taken her crooning and overlaid the notes, making a song of his own.

Toni hears them all now, in an urge to soothe their creator from her night terrors.

It takes her a moment, but she's finally able to clear her throat and sing back to them, a wordless hymn that Toni's been singing all her life.

//

Toni's not sure how long she sits there, but she's still nowhere near ready to go back to sleep, so she hauls herself off of the old couch and goes back to her worktable, JARVIS wordlessly bringing up her last project— the latest phone Pepper had asked her for, months ago.

_"Miss?"_ JARVIS is oddly hesitant, when he speaks.

"J?"

_"When you disappeared, I— I felt desperate for the first time."_ Toni's brow furrows at the growing distress in her AI's voice. _"I never wish to feel that again, Miss."_

"J—"

_"Please don't go where I cannot follow, Miss. I fear I cannot take it, were you to disappear again."_

_"JARVIS."_ Toni croons to him. "Baby boy, I'm not gonna leave you and the boys for a very, very long time."

_"You did not mean to leave us this time, either."_

"J, sweetheart," Toni's heart is breaking over her distraught AI. JARVIS has been steadier than Pepper, all these years, and she's finally broken him. "I can't promise that, baby boy. But I'll try and take you are far as I can go, _cor_." Toni hums.

_"That's all I ask, Miss."_

//

Weeks pass. Stane kicks her off the board— for her own _good_ , he says, _lies_. Pepper is a _goddess_ , and Toni only smiles when Pepper complains about the plasma, because Pepper is _hers_ , and between her nightmares and panic attacks, Toni tries her best to recover, like Pepper and Rhodey had asked.

Toni turns her attention to something she was sure she'd left behind— the suit.

It tickles at her mind constantly, refusing to let her forget it, not when she could make it _better_. Not when the allure behind the suit— she could help, she could _fly_ — keeps making new points in the back of her skull, not when it lurks at the corner of her dreams, in the shadows of the caves she escaped from.

So, Toni does what she does best— she builds.

She works on the suit with a fervor she hasn't had since JARVIS. Her first tests, with just the boots and the hand stabilizers, gives her an exhilaration high like never before.

(She can _fly_ again.)

Her first full test flight makes her long dearly for her wings, makes her miss the wind against her face, but she can _fly_. The wind buffeting against her body is an old familiar friend, ever unchanging in an ever-fluctuating world. She turns from skimming the ocean to climb up, up, up, cheering breathlessly as she soars.

Except— except she's _falling_ , and she's still excited, because she forgot the damn icing problem, but she can _fly_!

(Toni doesn't quite notice the water on her face until she climbs out of the suit, too elated, but then there's a burst of cold air and she can feel it dripping and—

She comes back to herself, tucked in the corner, U and Butterfingers hovering over her, while DUM-E spins off to get the ratty blanket off the couch. JARVIS is still murmuring in the new earpiece she'd fashioned for them, a soothing mantra about stock prices that's only a step above his low crooning.

She might've just had a panic attack about the tears on her face, but _fuck_ if she's forgetting the fact that she's _flying_ again.)

//

JARVIS is a godsend, in those few months. He— and the bots, when Toni falls asleep in the workshop— are there every time she startles awake, unable to breathe and afraid to, terrified of breathing in water. He's there when she tears through countless bedsheets, sleep-grown claws having torn through them in her thrashing. He's there when the scales ripple down her back, when her teeth pierce her lips, when she can't remember _why_.

He's there when Rhodey has to go back to base permanently and she has to sleep in the workshop because she still can't always tell whether she's breathing water or air. He's there, more than once, when she wakes up _screaming_ , clawing wildly at her chest because she can't _breathe_ and it _hurts_.

Pepper's worried, she knows, but she refuses to talk about it because denial had always been the best medicine.

(Pepper usually rolls her eyes and retorts with something about the first part of acceptance, but Toni tends to quit listening.)

She's been hiding out, more by Pepper's request than anything Stane or the board could've even pretended to try and ask of her. Toni spends most of her time fine-tuning the suit, though after the first time Pepper comes to yell at her she designs a new phone that makes the board happy enough.

//

It takes Toni two months to venture back down to R&D, and she's greeted by very happy, if slightly nervous technicians that treat her entirely too gently, but by the third explosion she's managed to wrangle by herself they've learned some of the new body language Toni uses.

She has _fun_ , for the first time in a while, chattering excitingly and encouraging different products and ideas, and for a time Toni's able to forget, safely.

(Someone brings her a lidded cup. None of the department says anything, and Toni might not _love_ them like she loves Pepper and Rhodey and Happy, but R&D are some of her _favorite_ people, and for the next few days some part of Toni's mind starts to recover under the camaraderie of just simply building to build.)

//

Rhodey and Pepper force her to go to _therapy_. Toni doesn't hold a personal grudge against them, not really. It's just— how _exactly_ is Toni going to explain the thousands of years of trauma even _before_ Howard?

(JARVIS tells her she only has to talk about Afghanistan— which, Toni doesn't _want_ to remember. She thinks about it every night anyway; why bring it up in the light of day?

She goes. It's not _horrible_ , per se, but the second Dr. Abernathy _(Call me Nikola)_ mentions Yinsen, Toni's fighting the shift. It's only JARVIS in her ear that prevents her from snarling at the woman, only JARVIS that keeps her _human_.

Nikola, _damn her_ , is calm when Toni can look at her and see _her_ , and not her posture, her mouth, her _hands. Something to work on_ , she says. Toni hisses just be contrary.)

//

Toni's a little offended when she hears about the charity gala and Pepper didn't even ask her, but JARVIS amends that she can be forgiven for not wanting to wrangle Toni for her first foray after her capture.

(Toni spends exactly five minutes before she makes up her mind and throws on the newest Tom Ford that Pepper had ordered, because Toni's only just now getting better at keeping her teeth blunt and she forgets sometimes, but she can still enjoy a good party.

JARVIS just _sighs_ at her.)

//

The Audi drives like a dream, and it puts Toni in a better mood by the time she pulls up to the valet. Her mood doesn't last long, not after Stane roughly pulls her in for pictures and she has to keep herself from snarling at him, but JARVIS' crooning in her ear keeps her calm.

Mostly.

She spends a few minutes visiting, and no one notices when her grin is a little too wide, teeth a little too sharp. They laugh when she growls, amuse themselves with thinking themselves the predator to her prey.

After pulling away from another fruitless interrogation, she runs into Agent Coulson. SHIELD's been in her peripheral since Aunt Peggy showed up at the mansion and whisked her away from Howard and Maria for a scant few days, back before she'd gotten too busy to see her. Toni had been planning to go see her again before Afghanistan. Maybe she'd go after this, with JARVIS in her ear, so she doesn't _forget_ again.

(At least Toni doesn't _forget_ the way Aunt Peggy did. Does. She forgets the _why_ , forgets the reasons she's kept, but she never loses them completely. Half the time, JARVIS doesn't need to remind her, even in the throes of a nightmare.)

JARVIS has been watching them for her, both anticipating their request for an interview.

(Toni was interviewed by no less than _five_ separate agents in the first few days home. She'll be damned if she's letting yet another one happen off of her terms.)

Agent, Toni dubs, is an unassuming man that doesn't _quite_ put her on edge, but she doesn't like him. At least his smile is a little more genuine than Toni expects, but she quickly forgets him in light of spotting Pepper amongst the crowd.

// Toni makes Pepper blush, teasing her about the backless dress mercilessly until Pepper banishes her to go get drinks. Once again she's ambushed, but thankfully it's not by another agent.

Christine Everhart is not Toni's favorite person, but the pictures she'd acquired for her little interrogation are intriguing, to say the least. While JARVIS runs numbers in her ear, Toni shoves the pictures back at Everhart and winds her way back to Pepper, because she's not sure she won't do something she (won't) regret to Stane.

//

Toni's drive back is... _reckless_ , at best.

Or that's what JARVIS comments, at least, as Toni slams on the brakes, just barely turning the car off before she's storming into her workshop, scales rippling down her spine and arms, fangs piercing her lip as she snarls.

_Pissed off_ is a light way of putting Toni's mood right now.

Because Stane was selling _her **weapons**._

Toni is old. Very, very old, well beyond the thirty years she's graced the limelight as Stark Industries' CEO, as Howard Stark's daughter. In all her formidable years, she's seen war. She's been in war. She's watched thousands of men, driven by love, by loyalty, by command, die to useless battles fought over _nothing_ , over meaningless strips of land that long outlived the bloodshed poured over them.

Toni's always hated senseless violence. That's little more than what this war was, at the end of the day, but she'd forgotten that in the light of Rhodey.

Rhodey, who'd gone off to war, to fight a battle only he saw worthy. And Toni, old, old, _old_ but still so very _young_ , had sought to protect her _fratello_ , her _lux_.

Toni is a selfish creature at heart. It's in her very nature, and she's never been one to deny herself. So, she'd done her best to protect Rhodey from the horrors she'd seen before, off a battlefield she wanted no part in.

And sure, she'd kept to armor, to communication, at first, but it wasn't _enough_ for the rest of them. For Stane, for the government. They'd used Rhodey _against_ her, made him ask a question he'd never wanted to. Toni remembers the anger in his eyes, the despair in his voice.

Toni's always been selfish.

So, she'd built them their precious weapons. Guns and bullets and bombs and grenades, broken the records with her inventions.

Sure, Toni's been bitten in the ass before. It's certainly not the first time, but perhaps this is the first time Toni's been angry enough to fight _back_ against it.

Toni remembers the conversation she'd had with Rhodey, before he'd had to go back full time.

/

_"Rhodey, I'm working on something big." Toni murmured into his chest, while Rhodey's hand carded through her hair. She'd had yet another nightmare, one in the millions that had plagued her since she'd gotten home._

_Rhodey's hand didn't even pause at her words, just kept lightly scratching at her scalp and back when he swept over them._

_"Something big, Tones? I thought we were done with the weapons." His voice was gentle._

_"It's different Rhodey. I want you there for it."_

_Rhodey shifted a little, and Toni felt him press a kiss to her crown._

_"Okay, baby girl. Whenever you're ready, yeah?"_

_"Yeah."_

/

Flying over the Hudson had been exhilarating, but flying cross-country made her long wildly for her wings, even as the anger burning in her stomach kept her from dipping to play in the surf, as she might've, even just a day ago.

But today she had to right a wrong, because not only had Stane fucked her and millions of people over, but he'd fucked _Yinsen_ over. Yinsen and his family in Gulmira, and—

(Yinsen was _hers_ now, her memory to keep alive, not quite one of her _precious_ people, but tucked somewhere safe, because he was _hers_ and he'd saved her, and the least she could do was save his Gulmira, when she hadn't been able to save him.)

//

Toni can't honestly say she _remembers_ Gulmira with any sort of clarity beyond anger and fire, but her mind's suspiciously clear in a way it usually only is after a Pepper-worrying building binge.

JARVIS notes that the fight was wonderfully excessive, and several women and children escaped safely.

Of course, they're having this conversation when Toni suddenly has two F-22s on her ass, and Rhodey in her ear yelling at her, because she's in an active war space, there's a pilot with no plane and no _parachute_ , and he's _worried._

Toni laments on this after she's saved the pilot, high on adrenaline after the rushed dive she'd gone into to save him, and _really,_ they had to move past _jammed parachutes_ when Toni was here, because she'd be damned if this ever happened to Rhodey, despite the fact that he hadn't been in a jet since '91.

(Rhodey _and_ Pepper yell at her when she gets home. She's only not grounded from the workshop because the bullets didn't even leave a bruise on her, but she gets them to leave before the one from the plane wing starts to show up, because that one hurts like a bitch but Toni's not even remotely _close_ to being done with this endeavor, because she'd _saved_ people and she hadn't had to create another weapon, hadn't had to get drafted for a war she didn't want.)

//

(The nightmares never end. Toni still wakes up _screaming_ , clawing at her chest with half-formed claws, until she and the sheets are a bloody mess. She wakes with blood in her mouth, lips torn open from fangs ill-fitted to her jaw. She'd woken _crying_ and _begging_ for it to stop, gasping for air because there was _water on her face_ and she didn't know the dark corner of the room from the dark corner of the bucket.)

(JARVIS kept the lights on low after that particularly bad nightmare.)

//

Stane's in her mansion.

Stane's in her _fucking_ mansion and she can't move and JARVIS isn't responding, and Toni's _angry_.

The taser keeps her mostly down, but Toni isn't exactly _human_ , and so it can't keep her entirely paralyzed, and she gets a good slash at Stane's arms with her half-formed claws. She snarls at him as he darts out of the room, briefly fighting the change as she struggles her way down into the workshop, pain radiating from the open hole in her chest.

DUM-E, her amazing, _wonderful_ firstborn, offers her the other reactor JARVIS had _insisted_ she'd make. Toni had been content to leave it at one, but JARVIS had practically fabricated the damn thing himself before she'd finally broken and built it.

Toni would have to thank him later, after she made sure Pepper was safe.

(She'd have to _shower_ him with whatever he wanted, because her beautiful boy had called Rhodey before Stane had managed to shut him down, and seeing Rhodey calmed her down enough to think clearly— at least enough to remember _why_.)

//

Obadiah Stane had been a particularly _memorable_ friend of Howard Stark's. Long before Toni had lost Maria to the wine and the parties, Toni had never trusted Stane, whenever he came to visit for a business meeting.

He'd been there throughout her childhood, through Jarvis and Ana and Rhodey, through Maria and Howard and MIT. He'd tried weaseling his way into her good graces ever since she'd been young, had offered her little pieces of candy and trinkets and other meaningless bullshit, only accepted because Maria had insisted it was polite.

(Toni only listened after Jarvis had told her it was better that she accept the little 'gifts', but it didn't mean she had to _like_ him.)

He'd been there through her inheritance of the company, had tried to convince her that he was enough to run the company until she came of age. Really, Toni hadn't had a choice on that front, because Howard's will had been written specifically, and at age 21 Toni had stormed that boardroom with her own attorney, and had _taken over her company._

But he'd gone entirely _too far_ this time, what with selling _her weapons_ behind her back, like this was an idea she'd ever sanction.

//

He's _laughing_. Stane's fucking _laughing_. He's cloaked in the armor from Afghanistan, the old, stiff suit she'd left strewn in the sand, _her reactor_ powering it.

Toni _snarls_ , rips herself from his grip, and shoots up into the air, because she's entirely _done_ with this fight and she's going to end it in _her_ territory.

She waits until he's chasing her, leads him through the power cores of SI's research center, darts off for the night sky as soon as she clears the last power line.

His hand clamps down on her ankle, but they're high enough, now. She can see the ice starting to creep up the colder parts of the suit, spreading outwards.

"How'd you solve the icing problem?" Toni taunts, as his faceplate goes black.

She doesn't let him drop far, just enough to let the suit power back on, let him keep his own weight in the air, and then she's _on him_.

The suit peels back from her hand as she digs a clawed, scaled hand through the sensitive cables in the neck of the suit, tears the delicate wires from their sockets and lets them drop into the ocean, rips the helmet from his head and lets her own faceplate click open.

Toni's not entirely sure how much of herself she's managed to keep back, but she can feel the skin on her face tightening, feels the scrape of her fangs against still-soft lips, but she doesn't _care_.

She _delights_ in the way his face pales at the sight of her, snarls at him with all the fury that had been building in her stomach since the charity gala.

The suit, sans the reactor, is completely dark around him. She spares one last second to tear the reactor from his chest, before she lets go of him, watches with dark glee as he struggles to free himself from the suit, screaming all the way down.

He makes a particularly loud splash against the water, and Toni watches pieces of the suit scatter.

Toni watches until most pieces of the suit have drifted away, and Toni can no longer see him beneath the gentle waves.

//

Toni's not entirely sure _how_ Agent got into Pepper's good graces, but she's fairly annoyed about this. At least Rhodey had insisted on coming with her, and apparently even Rhodey's presence will not prevent Agent from getting his spiel out.

Surprisingly, he leaves off the interview. When Toni asks him about it, Agent just smiles blandly and tells her the other bureaus finally shared their collected notes.

Toni hisses lowly at him, determined to be annoyed at _someone_ tonight, but Agent doesn't comment as they bustle her into the hospital, Rhodey determinedly at her side.

She feels guilty for giving him yet _another_ heart attack in the span of a few weeks, between the F-22 pilot and tonight, but she doesn't regret it. Stane was an asshole, and Toni promptly tells Rhodey as such, once they're alone.

Rhodey just laughs into his hands for a moment. It takes Toni a moment to notice that he's crying.

"Just- god _damn_ it Tones! I can't keep doing this baby girl, we _agreed_." He looks up at her, tears dripping down as he pleads at her. "We _agreed_ on _this_ \- you stay _safe_ Toni! What the hell is _this_?!"

_"Rhodey."_ Toni softly croons. It's not the first time she's made the noise at him, not by far, but it's the first time since Afghanistan. He jolts a little, at her tone, the soft sing-song around his name. "I'm sorry, platypus. I didn't _plan_ on this happening." Toni holds out her arms and pouts until Rhodey comes to hug her.

"I can't keep pretending that this isn't happening though, Rhodey-bear." Toni whispers into his ear. "I'm in it whether or not I want to be, and I can't _stop_. Not now, not- not after Afghanistan."

Rhodey hugs her tighter, uncaring of the reactor, at this point.

"Just don't leave me behind, Tones. I can't let you go out there alone, baby girl, _please_ don't ask me to."

"Rhodey." Toni's crooning again. "I would _never_."

//

Really, it's only on Rhodey's insistence that she keep her identity a secret that she doesn't blurt it out at the press conference. It's on the tip of her tongue, and she almost says it when she spots Agent, but Rhodey's glaring next to him and she's already pushed her limits. So, she lies.

_"Iron Man is a bodyguard."_

//

It's late when Toni gets back to the mansion, and Toni hasn't _forgotten_ JARVIS, about whatever Stane did to him, but she hasn't lived this long without gaining _some_ self-preservation skills, as little as Rhodey claims she uses them.

So, it's not JARVIS that's on her mind when she stalks into her kitchen, eyes catching onto the figure standing by her window.

Sadly, it's not Agent. She would've preferred him.

Instead, she gets the lucky chance to meet the head of SHIELD himself, one Nicholas J Fury.

Toni has old, small memories of Fury. Little flickers, of a man without an eyepatch, whenever Peggy would whisk her away for a few days. He never made her feel like Howard or Stane did, but she never quite... _trusted_ him, the way she did Peggy. She sincerely doubts Fury remembers it, and if Toni's honest with herself, she is too.

But SHIELD was now something she had to deal with, something she had JARVIS monitoring, and something she had to watch over, because as much as she did not own the department, she funded it, and she'd be damned if it wasn't _hers_.

Fury, though, could get the hell out of her house.

He rattled on about a _superhero_ team, and at that Toni had to scoff.

"I'm not interested in your little boyband get together, Fury." She growls. "Get out of my house."

"You can't ignore this forever, Stark." He tries to warn her, as he leaves, but Toni calls _bullshit_. She'll defend what's _hers_ until the day she dies, but she sure as hell won't join any SHIELD-sanctioned team unless _she_ decides to.

//

(The file JARVIS pulls up after she's rebooted him— with new security protocols and firewalls— is laughable, at best.

Fury doesn't _like_ her, from what she can tell. Agent's a bit more neutral, but Fury's firmly certain she's lost her mind in Afghanistan.

Which. He's not _wrong_ , per se, but she's certainly more _handled_ than Fury would believe. Pepper and Rhodey keep her sane and help her mind stay quiet, and Happy's around if she can't find Rhodey or Pepper. Her R&D team are, admittedly, a little worryingly accepting, but they're a safe enough place that Toni can let her guard down some.

And Toni always, _always_ has JARVIS at the end of the day. Her _cor_ , there until her end, and then some.)


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I'll admit I kind of hate this but I hate it being incomplete more, so,,,,
> 
> I also would like to say I did not plan on a hidden identity. That's not even a joke. I genuinely forgot that even happened until like, midway through writing this.
> 
> There is a scene added to chapter one, not quite two hundred words. Not a big change or anything, just something to tie in with this chapter.

It's been six months.

Six months, since Toni dropped her supposed godfather into the ocean.

Well over a year since she clawed her way out of a cave.

Six _fucking_ months, and she's still having these goddamn nightmares.

It's three am, and Toni's clenching her jaw, trying to calm herself down enough that her teeth quit piercing her lips. Rhodey's on the bed next to her, her hands in his as he rubs them together. Between that, and Rhodey's voice quietly telling her a story about his squadron that she hadn't heard yet, it's working.

Well. She's calming down, at least. Her jaw doesn't feel so _small_ now, and her back doesn't ache with the threat of extra bones that don't belong there, and Rhodey doesn't have to watch for a wicked-sharp nail now, among her fingers.

JARVIS has raised the lights some, enough to banish the shadows in the corners. At least six months has given her boys enough time to figure out how to help her after, even if Toni is _long_ sick of it.

(Toni's beyond tired of waking up, chest _aching_ with foreign, phantom tools digging out her bones, lungs burning for air when they're filled with nothing but water.

She's more tired of the way _instinct_ takes over before she can wake up, of the way she tries to lash out against the disembodied hands, of the way she calls out for Yinsen, for Rhodey, for her bots. She's tired of fighting herself for control, forcing herself from her natural form, shoving the scales and claws and fangs back under her skin, until she no longer feels too _small_ for her body, until her skin doesn't feel quite so _wrong_.)

Rhodey's still holding her hands, though he's stopped rubbing them, instead brushing his thumb over the back of her hand. He's watching her with worried eyes, hands tight _(grounding)_ around hers.

"You okay, Tones?" Rhodey's voice is low, a little gruff with sleep, but gentle. "That was a bad one."

"Yeah, platypus." She doesn't have the energy for the flourish she'd given him the night before, and she ignores how her hands are trembling in his hold. Toni just closes her eyes and tucks her face into Rhodey's shoulder, taking a few deep breaths.

Rhodey gathers her into his lap, tugging until he's got his arms wrapped around her and she's tucked into his chest, letting her hands wrinkle his shirt.

Rhodey is different than Yinsen, in many, many ways. His heartbeat is steadier, slower, and he smells like his soap and her bed. She and Yinsen were never this close, had never wanted to be. But Yinsen had been her grounding point in Afghanistan, so she'd memorized him like she'd done to Rhodey. His heartbeat had been hummingbird-fast, quick and nervous in its rhythm. Yinsen had smelled like blood and water, a _damp_ metallic scent that quickly became part of Toni's world, for three months.

Now, Yinsen's _gone_ and Toni has Rhodey again, but Yinsen's still _gone_.

_Don't waste your life._

Four little words is all that Yinsen left her with. Words that, in the aftermath, Toni almost forgot completely.

(Toni doesn't remember anything that happened after she'd found Yinsen, and had only come to as she was falling back to earth. It's not the first time she's had a hyper-focus blackout, but she's used to having them in her lab, not as 'her way of dealing with the trauma' in the height of excitement, or so her therapist had said.)

Toni is old. She is far older than Yinsen would have ever been, is far older than Rhodey will ever be. She has seen empires rise and fall, has watched kings go from greatness to disgrace. She had a purpose long before she was trapped in a cave, had her own ambitions, mostly unrelated to the rest of the world.

But now, this is something Toni can _change_. Finding Stane selling _her_ weapons behind her back, to people Toni had tried to defend her country with, had enraged that possessive side of her. Toni won't— _can't_ — make weapons anymore. Not when the level of destruction she wielded was placed at the hands of corrupt people with corrupt intentions. Not when Toni has lived through more than one war, and she refuses to be a part of the suffering any longer.

_Don't waste your life._

 

//

 

Toni hates Howard Stark more than she can say some days.

For all that Maria had fallen in love with him, Toni had never seen whatever drew her mother to Howard's side. It had been a mystery to her, when she was younger, before she gave up on both of them altogether.

But for all that Toni hated Howard, she had to admit the bastard was a genius.

The Expo was always a thing of beauty to Toni, a way to share her ideas with the world, and in turn, see _everyone else's._ Toni had long loved _creation_. She'd loved MIT, with Rhodey, when everyone had been too sleep deprived and hungover and high to care who she was, when all that mattered was making something new from nothing. She'd fallen in love with humanity again in the early hours of the day, bent over next to her classmate, both of them barely awake, coaxing the metal beneath their hands to life. For all their scorn, their hatred, their _destruction_ , there was an equal balance of love and light and _creation_.

Thus, the Expo.

Now, for all her years, Toni's always been a bit of a vain creature. She'd never shied away from crowds, had lived her years dancing in and out of societies. The more materialistic part of her collection lay squirreled away in different countries; some on display, some tucked away. Some had been Maria's, and some were Toni's own. She'd always loved history, loved being a part of the crowd, of having a voice among the mundane.

But this is perhaps the first time Toni's been so _famous_ and not just a recognizable face in an endless crowd. So, if she uses the beginning of the Expo to preen in front of the masses, well, only Rhodey and Pepper are really judging. 

The joy and excitement of what the Expo represents is what really carries Toni's mood, even as Happy's herding into a car and a Marshall is trying to demand a court order out of her.

 

//

 

Senator Stern is not even remotely the highest-ranked on a list of men in power that Toni's mocked before. Certainly not the top twenty, but Toni still delights in the way his face rapidly turns red at her sniping and even Pepper's glare can't dim her glee.

They're trying to strong-arm her into giving up the suit, into building them more _weapons_. She'll embarrass them all day long, so long as they keep making outrageous demands. They can't torture her.

Toni's been there, done that. Got the t-shirt and promptly burned it.

She thinks about sending whoever invited Hammer a fruit basket, because Toni's never had so much _fun_ practically destroying another man's career before. Honestly, she'd not mind the little cretin if he just wasn't so _arrogant_ about his accomplishments, as though he was always a step _above_ her, when in reality, he was so far behind he couldn't even _see_ Toni, glasses or no.

Pepper's about to court-martial both her and Rhodey, because Rhodey, despite all his formality and being the buffer between her and the brass most days, is usually the one _leading_ their little excursions. Today it's Toni, but still.

(Either way, Toni leaves the court room practically skipping, and Rhodey's laughing into his hand behind her. Pepper's glare has softened some, though she's still largely annoyed at them, but Toni can hear the laughter in her voice when she starts scolding Toni for calling Stern a prostitute.)

 

//

 

Taking the reactor out always felt weird. It _hurt_ , but the weight that usually pressed down on her ribs was gone, for a moment. Without it, Toni only had a few minutes before the shrapnel started to _burn_ , but Toni was usually done long before then.

The reactor is smoking, when she pulls it out. DUM-E and U are hiding in their charging ports, while Butterfingers, her little _fuoco_ , is hovering next to her, practically fuming but entirely unwilling to leave her alone until the reactor is back in her chest.

It's during these times that Toni feels the pull of her instincts the strongest. The urge to go _numb_ , to stop trying to parse through words and instead rely on actions and scents. Even as she methodically replaces the core and shoves the reactor back in, she watches scales start to thicken on her wrists, drifting lightly up her forearms, disappearing underneath her sleeves.

It's now that Toni starts to _forget_ again, that she starts to look around for Yinsen, or Rhodey, because they are _safe_ and they are _hers_.

JARVIS is _hers_ too, she remembers, hearing his voice, low and steady in her ear. Because he is _hers_ , she strains to listen, willing for the words to make sense to her again.

JARVIS' voice fades in as her scales soften back into her skin, until there is no trace of them having ever been there. 

 _"—500 fell 6.2 percent in the past year. The Dow dropped 5.6 percent, and in Japan Nikkel fell 12.1 percent."_ JARVIS recites the date, the weather, and then the stocks to her, Toni knows, because it's less about the information and more about his voice. Sometimes, he's even taken to crooning over talking.

Toni always finds talking too daunting after an ' _episode_ ', so she swallows until her throat feels normal, and she croons softly at JARVIS. He stops talking, his soothing return calming some of her nerves.

Beside her, Butterfingers beeps. Her _fuoco_ is clinging to her shirt with one claw, the other drifting towards her hand. He starts his own song, and together the noise coaxes DUM-E and U from their hiding spots, their own voices rising to harmonize. Toni closes her eyes, and _breathes_.

DUM-E's claw makes gentle contact with the reactor, resting softly on it as he sings to her. U comes to Butterfingers' side, reaching over his brother to grasp her shirt. She lets the song wash over her, brushes the last feeling of _wrongness_ away from her, until she's settled again. Scales or not, Toni's always fit in her own skin, but that in between phase was— _is_ — never comfortable. She's either too _big_ or too _small_ for her skin, her scales.

 

//

 

Their song ends before Pepper makes it downstairs, and by then Toni feels mostly human again. U's claw is resting in her lap and she's petting his strut while she works on a phone schematic in front of her. DUM-E is making a mess with JARVIS attempting to direct him over at the sink, trying to make one of the smoothies JARVIS has prescribed her.

Butterfingers is sorting her tools again, because he is a perpetually angry AI and sorting calms him down. He's also still mad about her taking the reactor out, so he's firmly faced away from her while he works.

_"Natasha Antonia Stark!"_

Pepper hasn't full-named Toni in a while.

"Did you seriously donate the _entire_ modern art collection to— to the—" Pepper's _angry_ , and at her tone Butterfingers turns around with a triumphant beep.

"The Boy Scouts of America?" Toni finishes, shooting Butterfingers a glare before she turns all of her attention to Pepper. She's glaring at Toni, files tucked under her arm, hand gesturing towards the few pieces she'd let Pepper hang in the workshop.

(Pepper's _safe_. Pepper is _hers_. Toni's not sure why her mind still tries to _forget_ , because part of Toni wants to snarl at Pepper, wants to _shift_ and let her claws tear away at the _anger_ until Pepper isn't _angry_ but _scared_ and—)

"Toni!" 

There's blood dripping down Toni's wrists, onto U's strut, onto the floor. She doesn't wince as she flexes her hand, freeing her claws from her palms, and Toni can't help but stare at her red-tipped nails.

Pepper's hand touches her shoulder.

Sound very suddenly comes rushing back to Toni, where she was unaware it had even gone away. JARVIS is murmuring, singing, _crooning_ in her ear. U's claw is firmly entangled in her shirt, and his beeps are muffled by the fabric. Butterfingers and DUM-E aren't quite singing with JARVIS, but their song washes over Toni's _soul_.

At the center of it all, there's Pepper at her side, quiet, but _there._

(Pepper's safe. Pepper's _safe. Pepper's_ safe.)

"Pep," Toni croaks. Pepper tugs Toni into a hug, tucks her face into her neck and hums right along with JARVIS, because Pepper's never asked, but she's always _there_.

(Pepper is _hers_.)

 

//

 

(Toni didn't notice Pepper's angry words fading into nothingness, while she watched the lights flash off of Pepper's hair. She didn't notice U beeping, _whining_ , underneath her chin, didn't notice Butterfingers' immediate turn-about, didn't notice Pepper's angry ranting turning into concern, until Pepper touched her arm.

JARVIS noted it all, watching over Toni, his self-proclaimed primary objective. His creator— his _mother's_ — descent into solitary madness was sickening, and JARVIS could do little about it, except croon his song into her ear and hope a solution was found, because he wasn't certain that she could change this behavior, so long as the palladium poisoned her blood.)

 

//

 

Pepper drags Toni out from the workshop to clean up her hands, and promptly sits her down on the couch and refuses to leave until Rhodey gets back a few hours later.

Tucked between Pepper and Rhodey, surrounded by JARVIS and the sounds of _Monty Python_ , Toni feels _at_   _home_. Rhodey's practically glued her into his side, and Pepper's got her feet in her lap, occasionally rubbing her ankles or tapping her toes when Toni makes a particularly snarky comment. They don't talk about what happened in the 'shop, but Toni knows Pepper confirmed that her therapist appointment was still booked for the week, and Rhodey keeps dropping kisses to her crown or her temple.

Mid-way through a glass of wine, Toni declares Pepper CEO, and has JARVIS pull up the paperwork and the suit schematic she'd drawn up for Rhodey.

They're both too shocked to really question her, and when Rhodey tries to hustle past it and start interrogating her, she makes JARVIS turn on her salsa playlist and drags Rhodey to his feet. 

Toni's _exhausted_ by the time she fully distracts them, but her face and chest are hurting from laughing and smiling so hard, and Rhodey lets her sprawl over his chest while Pepper rubs her ankles until she falls asleep.

 

//

 

(It's a rare night that Toni doesn't have any nightmares, but thankfully tonight is one of them.

She wakes up a few hours before Rhodey, and she just lays there and listens to Pepper's breathing and Rhodey's heartbeat.

She could do it, she knows. Tell him.

She's had these passing thoughts since— since _seventeen_ , since a funeral, since _Maria_.

It'd be easy; take him out to the coast, like she did with her boys. He's been with her to Italy, wouldn't even question it.

Her thoughts have changed since seventeen; Rhodey's stuck with her through thick and thin, had glued himself to her side, and when he couldn't be there, tossed her into the open embrace of _his_ family. So, she's not concerned about him leaving, not _really_.

(Those thoughts never truly leave Toni; she's been wondering the same about Pepper and Happy, and Toni doubts she'll ever lose them, whether they question morale or mortality.)

Toni _trusts_ Rhodey. She could tell him.

But— there's still the lingering fear behind the hesitation, still a question of _will I lose him?_ that she can't risk. Not— not when she doesn't quite know what to _do_ , yet. Not when there's a chance, that after, she didn't _have_ to use her last resort.

So, she could tell him.

But she won't.)

Eventually, the rhythm of Rhodey's heartbeat, combined with the low hum of electricity surrounding her doesn't quite send her back to sleep, but she dozes until Rhodey starts shifting underneath her.

He has to go back to base in a few hours. Toni wakes Pepper and they sleepily pester him into making them breakfast, and continue to hassle him until he leaves. She and Pepper doze for a while more, until JARVIS reminds Pepper of a meeting that afternoon. She only leaves Toni alone after JARVIS confirms that he'll call her if Toni has another _episode_.

Toni would be annoyed, but she feels truly _settled_ in a way she hasn't in a few months. She can't tell if something's going to happen, or if it's just her shot nerves.

Either way, she's got a bot and a kitchenette to clean.)

 

//

 

Happy's been Toni's driver before she promoted Pepper. He'd demanded she start boxing with him a few months after she hired him, and even after Toni thoroughly kicked his ass he'd insisted that they train at least once a week. 

They'd long moved beyond boxing after a few months, but Happy usually cycles back to the basics before expanding to the new exercises, so today he's got the chest pad on while he defends against Toni's attacks.

Pepper very rarely interrupts their sparring time, because it gets her out of the workshop for a few hours, or so Pepper said when Toni asked. Today is an exception.

Happy gets a lovesick expression on his face for a brief second before he's focusing on Toni again. Toni finds it adorable, but since he's also not _done anything_ about it, she elbows him in the face.

"What the hell was that?" Happy's glaring at her now, but Toni just grins at him and dances out of his range.

"Mixed martial arts, sweetheart," she teases back, ducking away from his gloves. "it's been around for about three weeks."

"It's _called_ dirty boxing, and there's nothing new about it." he grumbles at her, finally catching her enough to scrub at her hair before he lets her go. Toni just grins unrepentantly and turns to Pepper, sliding out of her gloves.

She's smiling at them. "I promise this is the only time I'll ask you to sign over your company." Toni's attention is drawn to the doorway as she hears footsteps, and an unfortunately familiar face appears.

 

//

 

Upon Agent's appearance in her life, Toni took it upon herself to investigate SHIELD as thoroughly as she desired, mostly to find out what she could about Agent.

The man's ridiculously private and it would annoy Toni more if Agent was less tolerable.

JARVIS had been working through the private folders, all the bureaucratic crap Toni didn't care about, but she'd flipped through the employee list briefly. Fury wasn't new to her, and Agent had little on his file, but he was the apparent handler to two agents himself: Natalia Romanova and Clinton Barton.

She'd found Clinton and his half-assed reports funny, but Natalia had... rubbed Toni the wrong way. She wasn't sure why, maybe it was the chameleon missions, or her history as _a Widow_ , but she'd resolved to just deal with it later.

It looked like later was _now_.

 

//

 

JARVIS is murmuring in her ear as _Natalie Rushman_ rounds the corner. It's nothing new, really, up until JARVIS says _Agent Coulson_. 

Apparently, Toni's house-call was arranged by Fury, but Agent saw fit to tell Toni about this... _evaluation_. Toni's not sure how to feel about this little rebellion, but Agent asked JARVIS to keep it quiet. Subordination, and all that.

Well. Toni can work with this.

Happy's not, well, _happy_ with her once _Natalia_ finishes kicking his ass, but Toni's a little too busy leering at _Natalia_ to apologize right then. She'll just give him the keys to the Bentley Toni had been keeping for his birthday.

(Pepper's a little harder to ignore, but a playful grin lets her in on the game Toni's playing, and she lightens her glare a little. Her voice is still hard when she tells Toni _no,_ though, so Toni takes the warning and goes back to silently ribbing Happy about his ridiculously obvious crush on an equally oblivious Pepper.)

 

//

 

(Honestly she and Rhodey need to do something about this soon, because the little furtive glances they keep throwing are giving Toni cavities. _Cavities_.)

 

//

 

Justin Hammer is a goddamn thorn in her side and Toni will make it known she's hated the bastard since day one. 

Just _why_ the little weasel is in Monaco doesn't matter to Toni at the moment, only that he gets his damn hands off her person. Everhart looks positively gleeful as Hammer keeps trying to levy with Toni, so she keeps snarking at him until Pepper drags her away.

 

//

 

Admittedly, Toni hadn't been aiming to actually drive in Monaco, when they'd first gotten there. The palladium check she'd done in the hotel had changed her mind, and after getting dressed and stealing her way into Pepper's room, she'd decided that _yes_ , she wanted to race.

It was _fun._

There was so much and so little to it, taking turns just precise enough to _not_ go careening into the barricades, but also coaxing the engine to give her _just a little more_ , as she passed another car.

Toni was having herself a grand time, up until the fucking _whip_ slammed down on the hood of her car.

An actual, electric fucking _whip_. 

A prickle of _alarm-anger- **mine**_ zings down Toni's spine when Happy and Pepper shout at her to _get in the car_ , because there's a madman with a fucking _reactor_ strapped to his chest in the same area as _Pepper_ and _Happy_ , and they're supposed to be _safe-safe-safe_ and up in the press box.

Toni loses a little bit of time between Pepper's door getting cut in half and getting the suit on. She blinks to find herself holding a crushed reactor in her hand, the madman staring her down as he gets led away by the police. There's pieces of cars strewn around her, and her neck hurts, but all Toni can focus on is JARVIS murmuring in her ear.

_"They're safe, Miss. Mr. Hogan and Miss Potts are safe."_

 

//

 

Ivan Vanko grins crookedly at Toni from his cell.

_If you can make a god bleed._

Toni's no god. She's never deluded herself that way. Oh, she can be narcissistic, she enjoys the spotlight at times, but Toni's seen men that held themselves above their brothers. Toni's older than this grudge that Vanko holds on her, and no matter what the American people herald her as, she's not a god.

But she's not _human_ either.

_The sharks will come._

Toni's eaten sharks bigger than her. 

Her teeth prick her lips as she quirks a grin back at him, blood staining them as she watches his face pale, briefly, before she turns to walk away.

"Hey, Toni." Ivan croaks at her back. "Palladium in the chest, painful way to die."

 Toni doesn't turn around as she leaves.

 

//

 

Pepper's _worried_ , because Stern's making noise about the suit. Toni's not entirely concerned, because she'd been planning to soothe the bloodied feathers Toni had sullied at the court summons, just not _quite_ this early.

Toni leaves Pepper and _Natalia_ to handle the press while JARVIS updates her on Vanko.

Ivan Vanko, son of Anton Vanko. Defected in '63, deported in '67.

_My father is the reason you're alive._

It's not true, not in the way Vanko thinks it is. Toni wouldn't have died in Afghanistan, reactor or no reactor. She won't die now, palladium or no palladium.

At least, not _physically. Toni Stark_ would die. Toni wouldn't.

But Toni's immortality aside, Vanko attacked _her_. He didn't go after Pepper or Happy, but they were _there_. Toni will be _damned_ if one of _hers_ gets injured. She's learned to accept that Rhodey gets injured sometimes, because of his career path, but Pepper and Happy are supposed to be _safe_. It's driving Toni a little crazy.

(JARVIS whisks away the hologram after Toni spends a little too long staring at Vanko's face. He starts up a low croon in her ear, getting a little louder when she responds. A few minutes later, when Rhodey comes into the workshop, he climbs into the passenger seat and hums low in his throat, right along with JARVIS.

Tears gather in Toni's eyes, because they've never asked, _especially_ not Rhodey, but they've always been there. Rhodey's always been there. He still doesn't say anything when her breath hitches, but he drops an arm around her shoulders and lets her tuck her face into the crook of his neck.

Later, Toni will drag Rhodey out of the car and explain the palladium to him, and he'll yell at her before asking JARVIS what they've got so far, with Toni tucked firmly into his side. He'll drag Pepper down and make Toni tell her and Happy, and they'll both yell at her until Toni's crooning at them both, letting them draw her into a hug so tight she can barely breath.

Later, they'll all fall asleep on the raggedy couch in the corner of the 'shop, with DUM-E draping the old blanket over them while Butterfingers stands guard, and JARVIS croons at them all.

For now, though, she tucks herself further into his embrace and lets herself _breathe_.)

 

//

 

(Later, Toni will realize the only thing keeping the aggressive thoughts at bay— _change, change, change, give them a reason to really **scream**_ — is Rhodey's arm around her shoulder. She gives it a passing thought, because they are _hers hers hers_ and Toni wants to _protect_ what's _hers_.

Later, JARVIS will hesitate, when she asks. Softly admits he believes the palladium is affecting her, more than just the 'high-tech crossword puzzle' bleeding into her veins.

Later, Toni will look over all of them, and wonder.)

 

//

 

(Toni's still not sure how no one's managed to catch her in the act of getting in the suit, considering she's never really tried to _hide_ it, but apparently the public can be easily convinced that Toni was merely getting to safety while her actual bodyguard dealt with the problem. Toni's still not sure how Pepper swung that one.

Hell, Toni stepped out of the suit at the Expo. She's starting to think it's a curse. If it weren't for Pepper she'd test the theory out more.)

 

//

 

Toni has a moment alone with _Natalia_ , while she's getting ready for the party. The agent's stiff, while Toni contemplates her dresses.

Because Toni likes Agent, even if she won't admit it to him or Pepper, she tosses his pet spider a question, something for her evaluation to contemplate. 

_How would you celebrate it?_

_I’d do whatever I wanted to do with whoever I wanted to do it with._

 

//

 

Toni's birthday party is _spectacular_. She'd promised Rhodey and Pepper she wouldn't do a repeat of her nineteenth, at least, but it's not like Toni _planned_ on letting _Natalia_ put a glove on and destroy the ice sculpture Pepper had ordered. So a little bit of the mansion gets destroyed, but the public still thinks Toni's wild and concerningly alcoholic, so Toni counts it as a win and ignores Pepper's annoyed glare.

Besides, Pepper's not glaring the next afternoon at lunch, especially when Toni takes the opportunity to smear frosting over Rhodey's face.

(Happy's teeth glint in the sunlight when he tilts his head back to laugh. Something in Toni jolts, tries to make her rise up and snarl him into submission, until he's hiding his teeth, until he doesn't _dare_ — 

Toni shoves that back down into the deep pocket of her mind and— warily— draws on the side of her that demands she hide away all that's _hers_ until they're _safe safe safe_ from prying eyes and roaming hands. It's _overwhelming_ , this instinct, and it's why Toni's kept it shoved down so far, because not five minutes later she's forcing Pepper and Happy into the corner of the couch furthest from the door, while she keeps herself tucked directly against Rhodey's side. They don't question her, even if Pepper throws her an odd look every time Toni squirms restlessly whenever one of them gets up until they sit back down again.

She tucks the instinct back again, but when Happy's head tilts back again, it's this instinct, and not the foreign, twisted anger of the palladium poisoning her blood that rises up within her.)

 

//

 

Later that night, after she and Rhodey had gotten sick of Pepper and Happy making faces at each other, she drags him down to the workshop.

She'd already told him she'd had his suit in finished schematics when she'd signed Pepper over, but his suit was already being fabricated when she'd told him.

 _War Machine_ , Toni tells him mischievously. His head snaps down to look at her.

"What aren't you saying, Tones?" 

"I know they've been on your ass about the suit since Monaco, platypus. This is my answer." Toni pats the chest, right over the deactivated reactor. She turns to grin at Rhodey. "He's only out on loan, though, so don't damage him too badly."

Rhodey's shaking his head, and he's quiet for a moment as he tugs Toni away from the suit into his arms. She presses her face against his chest and listens to him breathe, for a moment, the rhythm soothing her.

"Baby girl, you know I'm with you every step of the way." His voice is soft, whispered into her hair.

"I know, Rhodey." She murmurs back, lifting her head to butt into his chin gently. "It's yours buttercup, and only yours, but this way I can keep them off our asses and out of my business." 

He's quiet for another moment, arms tightening around her, before he takes a deep breath and steps back. 

"So when do I get to learn to fly this thing?"

(He's horrible at it. Toni can't stop laughing, even when JARVIS shows him her test trial runs, because even if Toni totaled the Audi, Rhodey flew into a _window_. And a wall, and, after narrowly missing U, had flown into his charging dock.

Rhodey manages to set off one of the shoulder lasers when JOCASTA's voice startles him, and Toni's cackling starts anew. 

After Rhodey's finally learned how to _balance_ , Toni suits up herself and races him over the Pacific, well into the night. It's long after midnight by the time they return, and Toni's far too elated and exhausted to have any nightmares by the time they collapse into bed.)

 

//

 

Toni spends a _very_ long time staring at a large doughnut the next morning, debating how much trouble she'd be in if she climbed up there. JARVIS _sighs_ into her ear, so Toni puts it on her bucket list and goes inside.

Fury slides into the booth across from her and Toni _growls._  

"I told you, _mon capitano_ , I don't want to join your little boyband." Toni huffs at him, popping the last of the doughnut in her mouth.

"No, no, no," Fury replies, easy and calm. "you do everything yourself. How's that working out for you?" 

Toni cocks an eyebrow in Fury's direction and pulls down her sunglasses to peer at him. She's not sure exactly where he's trying to go with this buddy-buddy conversation, but she'll play, for now.

"I'm sorry, I don't want to get off on the wrong foot here, but do I look at the patch or the eye?"

She didn't say she'd play by _his_ rules.

Fury scowls, briefly, before his expression smooths out again. "That's not looking so hot." He gestures to the palladium rash, just barely visible over the edge of her collar. Rhodey's mouth had tightened when he saw it that morning, while Toni was changing the reactor core again, but he'd let it go on Toni's insistence.

"I've been worse." Toni allows, because it's not _comfortable_ , being able to feel the metal creeping up her veins, but it's nothing compared to the reactor itself, still heavy and dragging on her collarbones. 

(Over six months now and Toni still finds it hard to breathe, sometimes, though whether it's phantom water or the reactor depends on the night.)

"You've been very busy," Fury starts. "you've made your assistant CEO, you're giving away all your stuff, you let your best friend take your suit. Now, if I didn't know better—"

"What do you want from me?" Toni growls. She'd grown completely _done_ with his little game the second he mentioned Pepper and Rhodey.

"What do we want from you? What do you want from me?" Toni scoffs at his tone, eyes narrowing behind her sunglasses. "You have become a problem, a problem I have to deal with. Contrary to your belief, you are not the center of my universe. I have bigger problems than you in the southwest region to deal with."

Oh, yes. JARVIS had told Toni about New Mexico, because SHIELD could keep it on the down-low from the rest of the world but Toni had helped produce some of their scanning technology.

(Toni had long loved the stars, from the time when the ocean was her second home and she knew little else about the world. She'd jumped at the chance to work with NASA when they'd asked.)

Toni's been growing aware of the silence of the diner over the course of their conversation. She's pretty sure Fury thinks she's hungover, which is _ridiculous_ , because it's a whole day after her birthday party.

So she's very aware of the presence coming up behind her, _very_ aware of the hand coming close to her neck. Toni's own hand wraps _very_ _securely_ around the other's wrist and she delicately plucks the object out of her mystery attacker. 

The syringe she holds up between her and Fury is halfway filled with a white liquid. Across from her, Fury looks unrepentant, but tense. Toni tucks the syringe into her jacket pocket before she turns to look at their guest.

She's unsurprised to see _Natalia_ standing there, not resisting her grip but not relaxed, either. "You're fired," Toni snaps, letting go of her wrist before turning back to Fury.

"That's not up to you." _Natalia_ quips back as she sits down next to Fury.

"That’s lithium dioxide." Fury nods towards the needle. "It’s gonna take the edge off. We’re trying to get you back to work."

"Funny, I wasn't aware I had a job." Toni snarled. "I'm afraid this little luncheon's gonna have to end early. I have other places I'd like to be more." She slides out of the booth and heads towards the door, JARVIS coming to life in her ear with a low hum.

"Stark!" Toni pauses at the door. "You're running out of time."

Toni's aware of her grin being just a little too wide as she turns to look at Fury. "On the contrary, _Nicholas_ , I have _plenty_ of time."

 

//

 

The syringe contains lithium dioxide. 

 _"Miss, perhaps we could take a small sample— Miss!"_  

It stings, Toni notes, as the black creeping through her veins starts to die down. It's not fully reduced, but it's cut back to simply surrounding the reactor again.

_"Miss! I insist that you take—"_

"J, baby boy, I'm okay." Toni croons, tossing the syringe away. "Just adding a little more time on the clock. Let's get to work, _cor._ "

 _"I do wish you'd stop overtaxing my servers."_ JARVIS grumbles, as she pulls up a formula.

 

//

 

Agent shows up on her doorstep two days later with a box. Toni hisses at him.

"I've been authorized by Director Fury to keep you on the premises by any means necessary." He says, completely unrepentant as he drops the box on her couch. 

"I'm on house arrest now?" She cocks an eyebrow at him, avoiding the box while she sits down and watches him survey the room. 

"Whatever helps you complete this project." Agent's smile is bland, as always, even if his tone is a little bitchy. Toni scowls at him while she turns to dig through the box, and hisses at him again when his smile turns _pleased_.

 

//

 

An hour later, Toni gets her revenge when he gets a call and, verbally, Toni meets Clint Barton. Agent keeps his face mostly blank, but Toni can still see the regret in his eyes when Clint drops a pick-up line and she immediately returns it.

(Toni may or may not have JARVIS sneak her number into Clint's phone. She then also may or may not spend hours on planning how to torment Agent, because Toni may tolerate him _far_ more than Fury or _Natalia_ , but Toni likes _consequences_.

Plus, Clint mentioning a hoverboard had her immediate attention whether Agent liked it or not, because ideas attracted Toni far quicker than anything else.)

Ten minutes into Toni and Clint talking, Agent looks up from his tablet to stare at her for a solid thirty seconds before he _sighs_ and goes back to whatever he was doing. Toni just grins in his direction as she tosses one of Howard's notebooks behind her.

 

//

 

(Toni absolutely _refuses_ to acknowledge the claim tugging at her. It's insistent now, demanding she nurture it, until it's as solid as the rest of her hoard. She's nothing if not stubborn, however, and so she ignores it until JARVIS starts on her about it, because he can't _feel_ it, no one can, but he knows the signs.

Toni only marginally regrets letting Rhodey spend so much time with her children, because all of them are entirely too meddlesome for their own goods. 

She outright _snarls_ when Butterfingers pokes at her incessantly, but he just beeps gleefully at her before spinning away.)

 

//

 

_"Incoming call from Colonel Rhodes, Miss."_

"Put him on, J." Toni tilted her head up, smile curving her lips while she waited for Rhodey.

_"Tones?"_

"Rhodey-bear! Listen—"

 _"Toni, baby girl, I can't talk long."_ Rhodey sounded apprehensive.

"Rhodey?" 

_"The brass took Hammer as a contractor. They're having him modify the suit."_

"She's on loan!" Toni snapped, more irritated by Hammer than anything. The bastard didn't deserve to be anywhere near one of her suits, let alone the one she'd made to keep _Rhodey_ safe.

_"Doesn't matter now. I don't who he's got working on the suits, but it's not looking good, Toni."_

"We'll deal with it, platypus." Toni croons at him, not liking the stress in his voice.

_"Just stay safe, Tones. For me."_

 "I'm perfectly fine, honey bear. Golden, even."

_"Toni."_

"I'll stay safe, Rhodey. I promise."

 

//

 

Agent leaves after she's dug through the entire box. She won't put on the tapes until he leaves, and he can't leave until she's looked at the tapes.

They have a stand-off for all of thirty seconds before Agent shakes his head and disappears somewhere upstairs, leaving her alone. 

("If you attempt to leave or play any games, I will tase you and watch _Supernanny_ while you drool into the carpet. Okay?"

Toni's teeth are sharp when she grins at him, _challenging_ even as the claim starts to build again, turning her _defensive_ into _fond_.

"I think I got it.")

Toni snarls at Howard's projected face as she flips through a notebook. She pauses when she hears her name, looks up to see a younger version of herself holding a model from Howard's set, eyes still full of hope. She'd been so _willing_ to keep giving him chances then, determined to see just what had caught Mother's attention about this man.

She's a little surprised she doesn't remember this, but she looks young enough that Jarvis and Maria would've held her attention far better that day anyway.

The video changes, and Toni keeps watching.

_"Natasha. You’re too young to understand this right now, so I thought I would put it on film for you. I built this for you. And someday you’ll realize that it represents a whole lot more than just people’s inventions. It represents my life’s work. This is the key to the future. I’m limited by the technology of my time, but one day you’ll figure this out. And when you do, you will change the world. What is and always will be my greatest creation is you."_

The sudden laughter bursting from her chest startles her, and then it feels freeing.

Toni _laughs_ until her chest hurts, until there's tears streaming down her face and she can't breathe and she doesn't know if it's because there's water in her lungs or not because _Howard— Howard fucking Stark_ , the bane of her childhood, the reason for her bruises, her mother's _killer_ , claimed to _love_ her. _His greatest creation_ , Toni thinks, gasping shallowly. _Well look at me now, Howard!_

"Toni?"

Pepper's voice cuts through Toni's growing panic. She still can't— can't _breathe_ correctly, but Pepper's _there_. She wouldn't let Toni drown, wouldn't just sit there if she was. Pepper comes into view, concern furrowing her brows as she takes Toni in.

She doesn't say anything as she drops her phone and the file of paperwork she'd brought on the coffee table, and carefully wraps her arms around Toni. 

Her touch breaks the dam, and Toni's dragging Pepper down onto the couch and burying her face into the crook of her neck. JARVIS is crooning lowly in her ear, and Pepper starts humming. 

Toni, when her throat's clear enough, tries to croon back. It's shaky, and she coughs a couple times, but neither Pepper nor JARVIS try to get her to stop.

They sit, for a few long moments, until Toni gets her breathing back to normal. Pepper starts to tug her away from the couch, and slowly leads her upstairs to the living room, where she parks her on the couch with a cup of tea and flicks the TV on. 

Toni falls asleep curled into Pepper's side, face tucked against her chest so Toni can hear her heartbeat. She doesn't stir until Rhodey joins them, sliding in behind her and letting her cling onto his hand when she reaches for him.

 

//

 

(They stay like that for the rest of the night, curled together on the couch. Happy finds them like that in the morning, gently wakes Rhodey and Pepper with coffee.

None of them ask about it when Toni finally stirs awake on Rhodey's chest; Happy just hands her a cup of coffee while Pepper announces she needs to head back to the office. She and Rhodey sit there for another few hours until Rhodey asks about it. 

He suggests burning the tapes when she's done explaining.)

 

//

 

Rhodey eventually has to go back to base. She feels very much eighteen again, watching Rhodey get on the bus for bootcamp. This time, she's standing at the end of her driveway, watching her platypus take off in _her_ technology. She's got JARVIS in her ear and her bots waiting for her, and dinner with Pepper later.

So Toni's not crying this time when she turns back to the workshop, mind burning with all the ideas in her head. 

She's got a house to wreck and some new elements to make.

 

//

 

A few hours later, Toni's torn out parts of the wall in her garage, and has a laser set up in the workshop when Agent walks in.

"Figured it out?" His voice, as always, is neutral when he speaks. Toni growls at him, because she's grumpy about the claim fully falling into place, even over the elation she has at building something _new._  

"Yeah, yeah, no _Supernanny_ for you," Toni snarks. "where have you been?"

"I was doing some stuff." Toni cocked an eyebrow at Agent, which went unseen as he started poking through the boxes Toni had stacked to the side in the midst of wrecking her workshop.

"Yeah, well, so was I." She huffed, glaring at the level over the coil. "Now what do you want?" Toni let her gaze slide over to Agent, as he pulled one of Howard's shield replicas from one of the boxes. 

"What's this doing here?" Toni huffed at him, before considering the shield. It might be tall and sturdy enough. 

"Give it here," She gestured at Agent, ignoring his sigh as she took the shield from him and looked it over. "Here, lift the coil." Agent tipped his head just slightly. "C'mon, put your knees into it." Just a little _more_... and _perfect!_  

"Perfectly level!" Toni crowed, after the level stabilized. "Now, _again_ , what do you want?"

"Nothing. Goodbye." Toni's head jerked up, eyes meeting Agent's as she tipped her head to the side, confused. "I've been reassigned. Director Fury wants me in New Mexico."

"Mm, running out on me so soon, Agent?" Toni let her lips quirk into a little smile, just enough to show her teeth. "Go on then, since your mistress awaits."

"Pleasure doing business with you, Miss Stark." Toni wanted to hate the bland smile he gave her, but the slight amusement in his eyes made her _fond_ more than anything else. She _hated_ new claims, damn things always made her so _soft_ to her hoard, and Toni didn't want to like Agent. 

"Don't do anything I wouldn't do, Agent." She shook the hand he stuck over the coil, pushing the croon that threatened at the base of her throat. 

"Noted." Toni watched him walk away, until the claim faded with his disappearance, and the urge to croon left with him.

"Alright baby boy, time to get to work."

_"Indeed, Miss."_

 

//

 

The new reactor glowed a brighter, lighter blue than the palladium core. 

 _"Congratulations, Miss. You have created a new element."_ JARVIS' voice is hushed, when he speaks, and Toni spares a moment to think of his own love of creation, born entirely from long nights where she spent hours creating meaningless things, little things to help clear the fog that had been clouding her mind. 

" _We_ made a new element, _cor._ " Toni corrected, crooning at him.

 _"Running diagnostics now, Miss. Please allow me to finish them before you replace the reactor."_ Toni laughed, but stepped away from the reactor to pat DUM-E's strut while she picked her way across the workshop towards a tablet.

_"Incoming call with a blocked number, Miss."_

Toni nodded as she took a sip from the mug sitting next to the tablet.

"Phone privilege reinstated then? Lovely. Agent, how's the mistress?" 

 _"Hey, Toni."_ It's not Agent. _"How you doing? I double cycle."_

"You what?" Toni mouths trace him towards JARVIS, turning to slide her phone from her pocket to transfer the call.

_"You told me double cycle's more power. Good advice."_

"You sound pretty sprightly for a dead guy." Toni hedges, curious despite herself.

 _"You too."_ Toni scoffs at this. Toni was far older, and would live far beyond, Ivan Vanko. _"Now the true history of the Stark name will be written."_ Toni cocked an eyebrow. The tablet flashed, JARVIS lighting the device with Vanko's location. _"What your father did to my family over forty years, I do to you in forty minutes."_

"Neither of us are our fathers." Toni sniped back, watching JARVIS beginning to pinpoint Vanko's location. 

_"I hope you're ready."_

Vanko's gone with a click, but JARVIS has his location, now.

_It's at the Expo._

 

//

 

( _"Miss—"_

"If you wanna run some tests, better do it on the fly, baby boy. Assemble the suit while you're at it, we don't have time."

 _"Miss, the effects are unclear—"_  

"Not now, J." 

Toni coughs as she shoves the new reactor into her chest. There's a brief second, where everything is still, and then a sudden rush of coconut hits the back of Toni's throat and she's gasping for air. The sheer energy pouring from the reactor has her feeling alive. This one is almost in tune with her heartbeat, light pulsating softly. 

_"Miss!"_

"I'm okay, J. Just— _god_ — that tastes like coconut. And _metal._ ")

 

//

 

Toni's stepping into the suit when Happy picks up. Pepper's phone is off, as it usually is when there's an event, and Happy's driving her, so he's her next best bet unless Toni wants to involve _Natalia_.

_"Boss?"_

"Hey Hap. Listen, I need you to get Pepper out of the Expo."

_"What is it?"_

"It's bad, Hap, but I need you to get Pepper out, okay? Have her evacuate the crowds, while you're at it. I need the Expo as empty as possible in the next few minutes. And quietly, too. No need to panic." 

 _"Got it, Boss. You gonna be safe?"_  

"I'll be fine, Happy."

 

//

 

Getting to Rhodey is even easier, and the few minutes between him picking up and Toni's arrival at the Expo means she can attest that he's _safe_ , at least enough that she can turn her attention to _Hammer_ and Vanko.

The intermittent swearing provided by Rhodey also keeps Toni snickering until she lands on stage between Rhodey and Hammer. 

Whatever Hammer— and Vanko, the cockroach— had done to Toni's suit was _horrifying_ , but the line of drones standing behind Rhodey made something in Toni shudder. This wasn't supposed to happen, she wasn't supposed to give _anyone_ the same power of the suit, not in a million years. She'd made the same mistake with letting Stane get away with _selling her weapons_. This would be so much _worse_.

"J, baby boy, I want you in there with JOCASTA, okay? Keep her and Rhodey safe."

_"Yes, Miss."_

"Iron Man!" Hammer's voice catches Toni's attention seconds before his arm comes down around her shoulders. She can't feel it, but it takes a lot more energy than it should to not rip Hammer's arm from its socket. "What're you doing here man?"

 _"Where is he."_ Toni's voice is flat, a step above a snarl, when she speaks. She tastes blood, knows she's split her lip again from one of her fangs. She feels a little _too small_ for just a moment, before she can focus again.

"What? Hey, man—" Hammer tilts his head closer to the faceplate. Toni _snarls,_ for real, and it's loud enough that he hears it through the suit, even without JARVIS broadcasting her voice. He takes a step back, finally, nervously rubbing the back of his neck.

Before Toni can ask again, a loudspeaker over all of them announces the evacuation order. There's immediate grumbling from the crowd, but they all begin to shuffle towards the exit.

Toni turns back to Hammer, who's looking off towards the control area backstage.

_"Where's Vanko."_

"Who? Look man, you're not making much sense here."

 _"Where's Vanko, Hammer. I'm not asking a third time."_ Toni growls, starting towards him. Her world narrows, just a little, directed onto Hammer with a focus Toni hasn't felt since Afghanistan, a _hunt_ stirring in her belly. 

(The last time she'd felt it was after Yinsen died in front of her, just before she lost herself. At the time Toni was too distracted to identify just _what_ was stirring in her, but there had been claw marks in the suit's gloves, when she'd looked.) 

Rhodey's voice jerks her from her focus, in time to see one of the shoulder guns turning to aim directly at her.

"Rhodey?"

 _"That's not me, Tones! I'm locked up, you need to get out of here!"_ Rhodey's voice is panicked as the suit starts to turn towards her, stuttering and slow, and Toni _knows_ Rhodey isn't in control.

"JARVIS!" Toni turns, jumps into the air as Rhodey fires. The blast misses her by a few inches and warnings start to pop up in Toni's HUD. She doesn't need to look to know Rhodey and the drones are right behind her.

 _"Automatic override nonresponsive."_ JOCASTA's voice isn't quite a relief, but Toni knows, at least, that she's still in there. _"Coding error detected. System reboot pending."_

"J, get in there and help her."

" _Remote system reboot pending, Miss."_

Toni's piloting the suit on her own as JARVIS takes over from JOCASTA, dodging both Rhodey and the drones. Luckily, Vanko's drones are about as maneuverable as a bulldozer, so it's easy to shake them in the surrounding buildings, but War Machine is only a step behind the Iron Man armor. Rhodey sounds increasingly worried every time he fires off a shot at her, but Toni's avoided them all. So far.

There's a disorienting moment when Rhodey finally collides with her and Toni briefly has no sense of direction, no idea which way is up, and then her back collides with the floor in one of the biodomes.

 _"Toni!"_ Rhodey shouts. One shoulder gun unfolds and begins firing, largely ineffective at the moment, but if it goes on—

_"Suit integrity compromised. 87% of damage remaining until right arm system failure."_

Well. That.

"I'm good, platypus. JARVIS, what've you got for me, buddy?"

_"Initializing system reboot. Virus error neutralized. System control returned to JOCASTA in t-minus ten seconds."_

_"Toni!"_ Toni managed to wrench her arm out from Rhodey's hold, shoved the shoulder gun away from her and watched with —albeit slight— abject horror as _her own_ laser unfolded from the same shoulder and took aim. 

(For a second, everything slowed down, _instinct_ stirring something deep and terrible in the low point of Toni's spine. It would take _seconds_ for the threat above her to be gone, take longer for the laser to aim than it would take Toni to tear it apart— but _Rhodey. Hers hers hers_ was _trapped_ in the threat, she couldn't _do anything_ without hurting him—)

 _"System reboot successful. All systems active and available. Coding error erased, Miss. Welcome, War Machine."_ JOCASTA's voice tore through the haze Toni had dipped into, snapping her back into the present, even as she felt the scales rippling down her arms, the claws poking at the unyielding edge of the glove over her fingers.

Rhodey's suit briefly went dark and limp before JOCASTA spoke, eyes flickering back on while the system cycled awake. 

Toni huffed a sigh of relief and relaxed, letting her arms go limp as Rhodey's weapons folded away. Her claws receded, her scales faded back into her skin, as his faceplate snapped open, eyes wide with panic and worry. 

Toni let her own slide away, a glove sliding away as she brought her hand up to cup Rhodey's face.

"I'm okay, Rhodey-bear. We're good." Toni crooned. Rhodey tipped his head into her hand, but his eyes kept roaming over her face until he was satisfied. Toni felt her fangs still piercing her bottom lip, but Rhodey didn't say anything about them. She felt a brief surge of _love_ for _hers_ before Rhodey distracted her.

"Goddamn, Toni. You've gotta stop doing this to me, baby girl. My old heart can't take it." He grinned when Toni snorted, pulled back to stand up and tugged her up with him.

"Your heart's just _fine_ , platypus. Now _mine_ , on the other hand—"

_"Miss, there's an incoming transmission from Agent Romanova."_

Toni rolled her eyes, Rhodey cocking an eyebrow at her. "Put her through, J. Let's see what the Widow has to say."

_"Stark."_

"Romanova." Toni snaps back, the relief that had been pooling in her chest giving way to sharp irritation. _Natalia_ had already pushed her limits with the lithium dioxide, and mere seconds after Toni almost lost Rhodey was entirely too close for Toni.

 _"SHIELD's monitoring the situation, and now that you're not dying anymore you've bigger problems on your hands."_ _Natalia's_ voice paused, just before she started speaking. _Not Natalia, then._

"Dying?" Rhodey's voice is sharp, when he asks. Toni winces, just a little. She'd told him about the palladium, but she'd told him she _wasn't_ going to die, which, really, was the _truth_ , but SHIELD didn't know about that, and Toni didn't have time to explain everything, if _Natalia_ was to be believed.

 _"Dying? Toni?"_ Pepper's voice over the line makes Toni cringe, just a little.

"I'm fine, Pepper-pot. I promise, I'll explain after this is over."

 _"I'm holding you to that."_ Pepper's voice is stern, and Rhodey's glare only adds to Toni's— slight— building guilt.

 

//

 

JARVIS and JOCASTA start giving proximity warnings. Hammer's drones are on them now, and it rattles Toni just enough that scales ripping along her exposed hand for a moment, until she gets it under control. 

Rhodey takes to the air after a moment of aruging, because Rhodey is _hers_ but she's _his_ too, and then the drones are dropping into the biodome and Toni loses herself to the hunt again, except instead of her teeth and claws, she's using lasers and bullets.

Toni's more aware of herself now than she was in Afghanistan, the sound of Rhodey's guns keeping her afloat. She's briefly aware of _Natalia_ speaking at some point, and then _Vanko_ is standing in front of her.

He says something. Toni doesn't know what.

(She comes back to herself just as Vanko speaks. _"You lose."_ He coughs, before he goes limp. Toni almost says something, just as the reactor in his chest begins to flash _red_. She pauses, thrown, before the other drones start flashing and Toni's mind goes _blank_.)

 

//

 

"Toni! _Toni!_ "

Toni blinks.

She's unsure of where she is, before she catches sight of Pepper in the HUD. The faceplate slides back without a second thought, and Pepper's hands are on Toni's face, cupping her cheeks.

"Pep?" Toni lets Pepper inspect her, while she looks to the side. Rhodey and Happy are to their right, looking relieved when she meets their eyes.

"Hey, Tones, you good?" Rhodey's voice is soft, a shade off from the tone he uses when she's had a nightmare.

Toni looks around her again. They're standing on a rooftop, the Expo burning merrily behind them. Pepper's pressed her forehead to Toni's temple now, breath shuddering over Toni's cheek. She's trembling. Happy looks as shaken as Pepper is, though he's standing steadier next to Rhodey. Rhodey's brow is creased in concern, but it's slowly clearing the longer Toni looks.

She nods, in answer to Rhodey, before she turns back to Pepper, only just now noticing how she's got Pepper locked in her arms. When she tries to pull back, though, Pepper just shakes her head and Toni relents.

An explosion makes Toni pull back to look, watching as another building falls.

It's hard, and Toni has to work her throat for several seconds, but she manages to speak.

"I think we did okay."

There's a pause, before Happy snorts and Rhodey starts shaking his head. Pepper's quiet, but her shoulders are shaking and she's smiling when she pulls back. Toni quirks a small grin at her, breath coming just a little easier, because they're _okay. Hers are okay._

 

//

 

Two weeks post-Expo, Toni gets a summons. The cryptic address makes Toni not want to go, but she also doesn't want a Fury showing up at her mansion again, so she goes, JARVIS tucked in her ear.

The building, when she arrives, is non-descript and identical to the others surrounding it. Inside is even more boring, and Toni gets the feeling SHIELD keeps these around solely for the creepy vibe.

There's two guards waiting, at least, and one turns to lead her further into the building. They stay on the first floor, concrete unending except for the doors. Entering yet _another_ concrete room almost makes Toni sigh, but this one, at least holds Fury, and several cases opened to panel holograms. 

Fury's sitting in the middle of them, a table and two files sitting in front of him. Toni takes the other proffered seat, looks up to meet Fury's eyes, before she reaches for the file labeled _Avengers Initiative._

Fury's hand rests over the top of it. Toni lets it drop back to the table, tilting her head back. "I don't think I want you looking at that. I'm not sure it pertains to you anymore."

"What, me telling you no wasn't a clue?" Toni returns, letting Fury tug it away.

"This, on the other hand," he continues, ignoring Toni. "is Agent Romanoff's assessment of you. Read it." Toni cocks an eyebrow and waits until Fury drops the file on the table in front of her.

"Personality overview." Toni starts reading, amusement curling the side of her mouth into a smile. "Miss Stark displays compulsive behavior, is 'prone to self-destructive tendencies'? I'm hurt." Toni pouts at Fury, who ignores her until she keeps reading. "Textbook narcissism? Hmm, sure. Ah, yes, recruitment assessment for Avengers Initiative. Iron Man, yes?" Toni looks up at Fury. "It's a no from me."

"Read on." Fury flicks a hand at the file, sitting back in his chair.

"Toni Stark... not recommended? How is that supposed to work, then?"

"We'd only like to use you as a consultant."

Toni laughs, and closes the file, dropping it in front of Fury before she stands up. Fury stands up with her, takes her hand when she offers it. Dropping her other hand on his, she gives him a sickly sweet smile, showing far too many teeth. Fury, though resilient, leans back just slightly.

"You can't afford me." Toni lets him go, turning around to walk away. Fury doesn't call after her.

The door, when it shuts, is loud in the oppressive silence.

 

//

 

Toni's not sure just _how_ Pepper swung Stern into presenting her and Rhodey with the medals, but Toni's not complaining. Stern calling her a _national treasure_ is worth the pinch of the pin, especially when Toni smiles a little too widely and Stern keeps his distance afterwards.

She tucks herself into Rhodey's side on the ride back, a croon sitting low in her throat.

"Toni, what did Natalie mean when she said you were dying?" Pepper asks, still marking documents on her lap. Toni winces.

"The palladium was poisoning my blood."

"I thought you said you weren't _dying_ , Tones." 

"I wasn't! SHIELD thought I was, tried to get shady when they thought their savior was going to kick the bucket sooner rather than later." 

_"Toni."_

_"Pep,"_ Toni returned. "I _promise_ I'm safe, I'm not going to die, I wasn't ever going to die." That, at least, is the truth, even if none of them know just _how_ she was going to survive the palladium if she didn't discover the new reactor core.

Rhodey sighed. "You, baby girl, are _hell_ on my blood pressure." He pulled her tighter against him, pressing a kiss to her temple, before ruffling her hair. 

Toni squawked in protest, batting Rhodey's hand away from her hair but not at all leaning away from him. "You're hell on my suits, Rhodey. How could you let Hammer do that to JOCASTA?" 

"Tones." Rhodey's voice is flat, despite the amusement in his eyes. Toni huffs and crosses her arms. 

"Rhodes." He just laughs and wraps his arm around her shoulder again, thumb rubbing over her arm. 

"Speaking of Hammer," Pepper starts, still looking at the papers, shuffling through them now. "I heard he's doing just fine in jail."

Toni's head comes up, and she feels Rhodey turn to look at Pepper. "Pep," Toni starts slowly. "what did you do?" 

Pepper _grins_ when she looks up. It's not quite Toni's mad smile, but Toni's _proud_ of it when she sees it, can almost imagine the fangs poking under Pepper's bottom lip. "Just put him so far down in the ground he won't work his way out before he's dead." Pepper's voice is low, _vicious_ , and Toni can't help the smile curling at the edge of her lips.

"Pep, Pepper," Toni croons, song rough on her vocal chords, "you are a _queen_." Pepper's smile is a touch shier, a blush pinking her cheeks when she goes back to the papers. A moment later, she gives an answering hum, soft and high. Rhodey returns an answering note, his chest rumbling against Toni's arm, and in her ear JARVIS starts up his own song, a partner to hers.

The feeling in Toni's chest tightens and relaxes as she lets their song wash over her ears, soft and comforting and _hers_.

 

//

 

Toni absolutely, does _not_ , take assignments from SHIELD. She will make this known until her dying day. 

What she _does_ do, apparently, is follow leads left by meddling agents, because both Pepper and JARVIS have taken a liking to Agent and as much as Toni complains she knows neither one will ever let someone harmful into her close circle. 

But Toni still doesn't _like_ him, so he gets to deal with her sour mood while she drives up to this bar where a supposed general was drinking away his woes, all the while she bitches into Agent's ear. 

 _"Do you have any more pressing matters, Stark? I'm afraid I have other things to attend to."_ Agent's voice is calm, and mildly amused. Toni spares a moment to glare at the screen.

"Cheating on me already?" Toni chides, switching lanes. "I'd thought you'd wait until the second date at _least_ , Agent. You disappoint me."

_"Unfortunately Stark, needs must."_

"Fine," Toni huffs, flicking one hand towards the console, for all that Agent can't see her. "run off to your mistress, see if I care."

Agent is _entirely_ too amused for her when he hangs up. _"Until next time, Ms. Stark."_

Toni wants to hate him, but she can feel the claim over him thrumming with delight. She refuses to let it be without a fight, however, so JARVIS can quit gloating at her, thank you very much. 

(She texts Clint when she parks. An hour later, there's a video waiting for her. It's Agent, actually looking annoyed. Toni has JARVIS send Clint a new Stark phone, because Toni believes good deeds get rewarded.'

When Agent texts her the next day, tone _distinctly_ annoyed when he ' _recommends that she and Agent Barton cease communication_ ', Toni just laughs.)

 

//

 

"Mm, the smell of stale beer and defeat." Toni hums, as she slides into the seat next to Ross. "Y'know, I _love_ to say 'I told you so', General, but that program was put on ice for a _reason_." She clicks her tongue at him, tone slightly chiding. 

Thaddeus Ross switches his glare from his empty glass to her. "Stark." He grunts, clearly wanting her to fuck off, but Toni just _loves_ needling people who deserve it. 

"Ross," Toni purrs back. As much as she's been able to slip back into 'Toni Stark, the media's darling little death merchant', she still feels the urge to hiss at him, finds herself watching his hands, his _mouth_. "I hear you have an unusual problem."

Ross looks at her for a long moment. He's not particularly Toni's favorite brand of people, and his presence is clawing at her patience. She wants this to be _over_ already, but Pepper promised Agent wouldn't bother her too much, after this. 

He's learning a little too quickly, Toni thinks. 

"You should talk." Ross' attention is entirely on her now, and Toni wants nothing more than to snarl, to show his _prey_ her _predator,_ but JARVIS hums a low note in her ear and it gives Toni a boost, just long enough for her to end this quickly.

"You should listen," she snarks back, waving at the bartender when she finally makes her way over. A moment later there's a drink in her hand and Toni takes a sip. "What if I told you _we_ were putting a team together?" 

"Who's we?" 

Toni  _smiles_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> y'all. this is over eleven thousand words. e l e v e n.  
> i'm surprised it only took three months this time around, but i make ZERO promises for chapter three. absolutely none.
> 
> a couple things, to start off:
> 
> i don't know where this is going. i really don't. toni was supposed to be iron man/woman/whatever, and because of rhodey she wasn't. i don't know if there will be any romantic relationships between anyone and toni, and the only thing i can really tell you for certain is that is will fully fail to follow canon, except for some very basic, basic plot.
> 
> e l e v e n.

**Author's Note:**

> This may get edited at some point, so if there seems to be some changes you're probably (?) not imagining them
> 
> I have a prologue written. It's not necessary, at all, but if you guys want it, I'll go ahead and post it. I'll be honest, I wrote it a whole month before chapter one so the tone might be completely different but I'll let you guys be the judges of it


End file.
